Lost in the Stars
by Jasper98
Summary: Dr. Bryn O'Connelly's secret relationship with Dr. McCoy is jeopardized by the arrival of a menacing enemy aboard the U.S.S. Enterprise - the dangerous, but alluring John Harrison, aka, the great Khan. Will Bryn be able to hide her conflicting feelings for Khan from McCoy, or give up the man who loves her to the most wanted man in the universe?
1. Chapter 1

**I saw the new Star Trek movie last night and I loved it! I adored Benedict Cumberbatch as Khan and so that's what inspired this story! Star Trek is not mine and forgive me for any mistakes! Enjoy!**

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Chapter One-

"Doctor O'Connelly," I looked up to see Doctor McCoy standing before me. I stood up, raising my arm in a salute. He saluted back, rigidly, then looked over both of his shoulders and entered the room, shutting the door behind him. A smile broke over his face as I went into his arms and we kissed for a moment.

"What's up, Bones?" I teased, beaming up at him. His gruff features melted whenever he was around me, and I loved that about him.

"All medical personnel are being called down to the medical wing," He said, kissing my forehead.

"There wasn't an announcement?" I asked, pulling away from him and gathering my things.

"I thought I'd tell you personally," He grinned, but then his face grew serious. "Bryn, you know about...about Khan being on board."

"What about him?" I walked out of my room and he followed me down the hall. We reached and elevator and resumed our conversation.

"I just don't want you to get hurt," He said, sliding his hand in mine and squeezing it. "He's dangerous."

"I know," I smiled up at him. "But I won't get hurt. He's surrounded by soldiers all of the time. He couldn't lay a finger on me, even if he wanted to." Bones still was frowning, so I touched his arm lightly, and leaned in closer to him. "And I know for certain that my boyfriend won't allow him to." I stood on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek, and the elevator doors opened.

We walked into the hospital bay, and saw soldiers everywhere, all dressed in red, with a few doctors in blue milling about. Bones pushed through them, and I followed. I'd seen "John Harrison" before, but only in pictures.

"Is this it?" Bones stopped before a table, where a man clad in black sat, his posture erect. He had black hair, slightly curly, and piercing blue eyes. He looked even more intimidating up close, and I felt my heart quicken. Whether it was from fear or not though, I was uncertain.

"It," Khan said distastefully. "You speak of me as if I am not a man, just like you." His voice was deep, and his accent elegant. I swallowed, and made myself look at McCoy.

"After what you did, I doubt you deserve to be called a man, you sick bastard," McCoy snarled, and I stepped up, laying a few fingers on his arm.

"Remember what you're here for," I reminded him softly, and Khan's eyes moved to mine.

"I recognize this," He gave a sneer and a nod to McCoy. "To be the chief medical officer of the U.S.S. Enterprise. But you I am unfamiliar with."

"My name is Bryn -" I began.

"Don't answer him," McCoy interrupted me, glaring at Khan. "Your business is with me, not with her."

"You are strangely protective for a mere relationship of colleague to colleague - " Khan smirked, and McCoy's expression melted into anger. He grabbed Khan's shirt, dragging him up from the table, and pulling him close to his face.

"You keep your mouth shut!" McCoy roared, and I squeezed myself between them, pushing McCoy backwards.

"Stop! Both of you!" I cried.

"If Doctor McCoy is unable to perform the necessary examination upon Khan, than I suggest that Dr. O'Connelly take his place," Spock said, and I looked towards him. I hadn't noticed him standing in the corner.

"Bryn O'Connelly," Khan said my name, letting each syllable roll off his tongue. "That is the name your boyfriend was trying to conceal from me."

"He's not my-" I blushed, but before I could finish, McCoy's fist went flying into Khan's face. There was an uproar, and two soldiers grabbed him back, holding him steadily away from Khan. McCoy fought against them, furious, but I could not look away from Khan.

Because he didn't even flinch.

"Dr. McCoy will kindly be escorted from the premises," Spock said evenly. "Dr. O'Connelly will continue the examination."

"Bryn, don't!" I turned around as he was being taken from the room, and then the doors slid shut behind him. I sighed, my heart racing with embarrassment.

"Give me your arm," I turned to Khan. "I want a blood sample." He willingly obeyed, rolling up his sleeve and extending his forearm. I silently took his blood, and passed the sample to a nurse nearby. "Analyze this, please."

I took a stethoscope and listened to his heart, but it sounded no different than a normal human's heart-beat. "Cough for me," I asked, and listened to him cough. I checked his eyes and ears, but everything sounded normal.

"He appears to be a regular human being," I addressed the legion of people standing around us. "But Khan," I turned back to him.

"Yes, Bryn." He said almost...pleasently, and I was surprised.

"I did not give you permission to address me by my first name," I said, taken aback. "You will address me as Dr. O'Connelly, and only as Dr. O'Connelly. Am I clear?"

"Yes, Dr. O'Connelly," Khan smiled, and his eyes seemed to rip open my chest and stare clean into my soul. I didn't like it.

"Tell me why it was when Dr. McCoy punched you...you appeared to feel no pain. In fact, you barely flinched. Enlighten me."

"I believe the results of the blood test will answer for that." Khan said smoothly.

Just then, a nurse came back up to me, a puzzled look on her face. "Dr. O'Connelly," She said. "I - I'm confused. His blood appears to be altered, and there are properties here, see? That make him...like he is."

"I am unclear on what you are trying to tell us," Spock said, confused.

"He's a genetically modified human," I said quietly. "It means he's stronger, and faster than the rest of us."

All at once, every weapon in the room was trained upon Khan, who merely smiled lazily.

"Take him back to his quarters," Spock ordered. "He will stay there until further notice. Dismissed."

We all filtered out after a squadron of men escorted Khan from the room. I couldn't stop thinking about him, even as I went through the ship, looking for McCoy.

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two-

"Bones," I entered his quarters without knocking, and stormed right in. He was sitting at his desk, reading quietly. He looked up, saw my face, and bolted out of his seat.

"Bryn, whatever I did, I'm sorry - "

"You _embarrassed_ me," I hissed, grabbing his shirt by the collar and pulling him down towards my face. "In front of everyone. You made me look like some idiot teenage girl, who's incapable of doing anything on her own. I am a certified doctor! I've dealt with every possible patient imaginable, and I'm sure you have too! Khan is genetically engineered, yes, but you have to stop acting like I can't handle him!"

"So I should just let you go flying blindly at him, I shouldn't be concerned at all," McCoy pulled away, looking angry. "He's a mass _murderer_, Bryn! Are you forgetting all those people he killed in London? He's deceptive; he tricked that one Starfleet agent into setting off the bomb himself! Can you not see how I would be worried about you being near him?"

"You didn't have to snap at him like that," I said quietly, feeling angry.

"Oh, you're concerned with his feelings now!?"

"No!" I shouted. "But you made it pretty damn obvious that there was something going on between us!"

"What do you want, Bryn? Do you want me to just not care anymore? Do you want me to just watch you get hurt by him? Because that's what will happen if this continues on."

"You're impossible," I fought the emotion that was weighing down my voice and tightening my vocal chords. "Sometimes I question...I question...us."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Bones practically spat. I was so hurt, I could hardly bear it. I just wanted to run and flee like a child, not stand and face my fears like an adult.

"It means if you can't even _listen_ to me, instead of flying off the handle, then I don't know if - if this should go on." Tears threatened my vision, and I wanted to cry once more.

"Bryn, you're asking me to give up everything I stand for when it comes to you," McCoy's voice didn't soften, he didn't take me into his arms, and he didn't try to comfort me. "I can't - I won't do that."

"Then maybe this is it," A tear streaked down my face and I turned and bolted from the room. I ran down the hall and I heard heavy footsteps leading out the door.

"Bryn!" McCoy shouted behind me, but his voice was fading, which meant that I wasn't being followed by him. "BRYN!" I heard him thunder until I disappeared out of earshot.

Tears streamed openly down my face now as I cried, wishing that Bones would just hold me and apologize, and tell me he still loved me. I wasn't even paying attention to where I was going, but I didn't even care at all. It didn't matter who saw me upset now, just that Bones wasn't here for me anymore.

I paused, leaning against a wall in a random room, trying to take deep breaths to calm myself down. Currently, I didn't even know where I was, and all of me just wanted to lie down on the floor and cry.

"Doctor O'Connelly, is everything alright?" I looked up, wiping my eyes with my fingers. I saw a red-shirted woman sitting behind a control panel, a gun in her holster. I looked around, and with a jolt, realized that this was the prisoner's bay.

And directly behind me, separated by a thick panel of plexiglass was Khan himself, watching the entire scene, one hand pressed up against the glass, watching me _cry_.

"I'm sorry, forgive me," I quickly tried to regain my composure. "There's just...a lot going on right now."

"Do you need a minute?" She asked, getting up and extending the end of her gun towards me. "Take it. He won't try anything, but just in case." I took the gun, and watched her leave, the door sliding shut behind her. It was silent for a long time, and I took shaky, ragged breaths, not looking at Khan at all.

"Trouble in paradise?" I turned to see Khan standing next to the panel of glass separating us, only now he was at my side. I swallowed, well aware that there were tears running down my face still, and faced him.

"Leave me alone," I said, hating how childish and weak my voice sounded.

"Alone," Khan repeated, his voice deep as he pondered. "I barely know you, Bryn O'Connelly, and yet I can already tell that you've been alone for a great deal of your life."

"You're remarkably perceptive," I commented drily, frustrated with him. I began to pace the room, but he stayed where he was.

"I can see it in your eyes," He said, in such a way that it almost commanded me to look at him. "Every time you look at Doctor McCoy, you look like you are terrified of losing him. You need his strength, his security, and you need him to hold onto, because you have little else to hold onto."

"Why are you bothering yourself with this?" I muttered. "Why are you bothering _me_ with this?"

"You fascinate me, Bryn," Khan said, his emotionless barrier breaking for a brief moment. I could see he truly was. "You are so accomplished, yet something is always holding you back, keeping you from accelerating further. What is it? Tell me, Bryn, is it your past?"

"You don't know me," I muttered bitterly, old memories resurfacing. "You don't know anything about me." Suddenly, I was filled with fire, and I turned to him slamming both palms against the glass with a thud. "You'll never know what it's like to not have _anyone_. To have every single person you know _leave_ you, or _die_, or let you_ down_. You don't know how it feels not to be able to trust _anyone_, because you're too afraid of getting hurt. Don't you dare tell me that you know me, because you don't. _You don't."_

I sank to my knees, defeated, crying once more. My hands were still pressed up against the glass, raised above my head. It looked like I was surrendering. Suddenly, I heard a soft tap on the glass, and I looked up. Khan had knelt in front of me, and pressed his hands - much larger than mine - onto the glass, mirroring mine. I stared at his hand over mine, separated only by the glass in confusion. What did this mean? It was powerful, definitely, and made me stop crying as he met my eyes.

"I may not know you, Bryn," He said in a soft voice. "But I know the pain you feel. The pain of losing everyone you love. I've lost my entire crew, my entire family. And once you lose that, you have nothing at all."

A quiet tear streaked down my face, and Khan reached up to catch it, only his fingers were stopped by the glass. "Those people...all those people you killed..." I murmured.

"Vengeance, for what was done to my crew, my family," He looked away, and suddenly, I didn't see him as a monster, as a terrible, evil villain who only wanted power, but instead as a broken, hurting man, who only wanted to avenge his crew against the one's who had wronged him. I didn't ask, what had happened, but remained in silence. Finally, I murmured softly, knowing he would hear.

"I'm sorry," I breathed, and he looked up. "I'm sorry for everything."

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**Just wanted to give a gigantic thank you to all the people who have followed, favorited and reviewed this story so far. I mean, it's been out for not even 24 hours and already...thank you so much to everyone! Love you!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm honestly in awe of the amount of support this story has gotten, after only two days! Thank you all so much! **

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Chapter Three-

"Dr. O'Connelly," I looked up to see the red - uniformed woman standing at the door, a confused expression on her face. I pulled away from the glass, and quickly wiped my eyes dry.

"Yes?" I smoothed out my dress, flustered and embarrassed that she had seen me _having a moment_ with the prisoner. How much had she seen?

"Dr. McCoy wishes to speak with you," She said, glancing at Khan, who had gotten back to his feet, and then to me.

"I do not wish to speak with him," I said angrily. "Tell him, I don't want to talk to him right now."

"He sounded urgent, doctor," She pressed. "I would advise you to at least talk to him." Suddenly, the doors slid open, and McCoy was standing there, looking apologetic.

"Bryn, can I at least talk to you?" He stepped into the room and noticed Khan. "What is he doing here?"

"I was imprisoned here, if you cannot remember," Khan said snidely. "However, if you wish to let me go free, I do not object."

"Shut up," McCoy snapped, and turned to me again. "Bryn, I'm sorry. Can we talk about this please?"

"What do you have to say?" I crossed my arms in front of my chest, staring him down with much more bravado than I felt.

"Bryn, I just want you to be safe," He reached out and took both my hands in his. "I'm so protective of you because I don't want you to get hurt. Believe me, Bryn, when I say that would kill me inside if I ever saw you in pain. Today, you were, and it's my fault, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Bryn. I made you upset, and I'm sorry. I can't say it enough, but I can try, right? You have to know that I won't ever let anyone hurt you, and that I _will_ be protective of you, because - because if something happened to you, I don't know how I could live with myself." He was quiet for a long time. "I know I never tell you, and I never have, but...I love you."

My mouth was hanging open in shock, as I stared at McCoy. This certainly didn't make things easy! Using the L-word now, just when I was beginning to tell myself that I no longer loved him, and wallowing in my own self-pity! My heart was so conflicted I barely knew what to do.

"Bones," I breathed, looking down at my feet. "I don't...I don't know what to say."

"Say that you still want it, you still want _us,"_ He gently took me by the arms and leaned in closer to me. "Tell me you still care."

"Oh, Bones, of course I care," I murmured, meeting his eyes. He smiled with relief, and kissed me, right in front of Khan. I was surprised, but didn't pull away. Still, I found my eyes going to Khan.

He was standing in his cell, looking down at the floor, his lips pressed tightly together as he stared at the ground. I didn't know why, but I felt guilty, like I was betraying him somehow. I pulled away from McCoy, placing both hands on his chest and looking shyly down at the ground.

"Let's go," I said quietly. "We shouldn't stay here any longer."

"Am I forgiven?" He asked softly.

"Yes."

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That night, I found I couldn't sleep. I couldn't keep my mind off of Khan, and what he had told me, about taking vengeance for his crew. What exactly had happened to them that would make him kill thousands of people? Would could drive a man to do such heinous crimes?

I decided to go for a stroll around the Enterprise, a thing I often did when I was feeling restless. I tried to let my mind wander as I walked, but I couldn't help but move my feet towards Khan's chambers.

The doors were left open, which I found peculiar, and I tentatively walked in. The room was dark, and I looked around, seeing by the light of the emergency lights. "Khan?" I asked, looking at his cell.

It was empty.

My heart kick-started, but I realized that there was no way he could have gotten out on his own. There was no sign of forced exit, no broken glass, no blown transmitters on the wall. He was let out intentionally.

I didn't know where he was, but I needed to find him, why I didn't know. I started again out into the halls, my heart pounding. Where would Khan be taken, if not to the prison wing?

Suddenly, my heart stopped for a minute. I knew exactly where he would be, and where to find him. "The interrogation chamber." I breathed, and broke into a run.

Horrible images flashed through my mind of soldiers in red hurting Khan, hearing him scream to extract information. I burst through the doors of the interrogation room and saw the worst.

Khan was lying on a table, his limbs strapped down at his sides. All throughout his body were electrodes, at his temples, his bare chest, his sides. They were attatched to a machine, that looked nothing like a heart monitor. He was breathing hard, his eyes closed, and his body was covered in sweat.

And beside him were Kirk, Sulu and McCoy. "Tell us how what is in the torpedoes!" Sulu ordered, but Khan didn't even react, only stayed motionless on the table. "Hit him again."

McCoy turned a dial on the machine, and Khan was awake, electricity pulsing through him. He cried out in pain, and I couldn't bear to watch anymore.

"Stop!" I screamed, running into the room. All four men looked at me, as I shoved Sulu aside and placed myself between them and Khan. "You can't do this to him! Starfleet regulations order that this type of - of _torture_ is forbidden! Captain! Forgive me for saying this, but you are completely out of line! You can't do this to him."

"Bryn, go," McCoy ordered, his face dark. "You never should have seen this."

"He wasn't cooperating," Sulu said. "We need answers."

"Not this way!" I shouted angrily. Sulu tried to push me aside, but I woudn't have it. I had one hand behind me, extended over Khan, and the other curled into a fist, ready to fight. "I won't stand for this, not at all. This is inhumane. We're taking him back to Earth, and he will pay in his own way for what he has done. Not...not like this."

"Bryn..." McCoy began, but Captain Kirk cut him off.

"She's right," He said, looking ashamed. He had the right to be. "You two out. Dr. O'Connelly, I was wrong for allowing this, but...but we'll speak in the morning. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, sir," I practically spat, as they filed out. McCoy paused in the doorway, looking defeated.

"Bryn-"

"Don't speak to me," I snapped, beginning to take the electrodes off of Khan. "I never want to see you again."

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**Alright, so I know this never actually happened, but I have to take some poetic license in order to add to the story. More coming soon! Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Getting your reviews and favorites and follows are so exciting! I love it when I check my inbox and there's all these new messages from Fanfiction! So here's chapter four! Enjoy!**

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Chapter Four-

Khan looked up at me on the table as the door shut behind McCoy. He still had the electrodes taped to his body, and his breaths were shaky. Even with his advanced genetics - and no doubt stronger endurance levels - he was still in pain, and trying to hide it from me. I became angry, setting my jaw to keep my lips from quivering. I couldn't cry - I wouldn't cry. I couldn't bring myself to look him in the eye.

He was still breathing laboriously as I finished taking the electrodes off of his chest, my fingers wavering slightly as I did so. "Your hand shakes," He said quietly, his voice lacking some of the confidence that it usually had.

"I'm sorry," I ducked my head, my voice tight. I freed the bonds on his hands, his feet with the press of a button, and stepped back.

Khan rubbed his wrists, slowly sitting up, and I stopped, now realizing what I had done. I'd just freed the most dangerous man in the universe! Was he going to kill me? Snap my neck with my bare hands? Choke me to death? He was so big, and so strong.

My face must have given away my panic, because Khan raised both his hands in surrender. "Relax, I won't hurt you," He said softly. "You've had enough of that today."

I said nothing, but only tiurned around and faced the wall, tears springing up in my eyes. "What they did to you was wrong," I said quietly. "They hurt you, and they'll answer for what they've done."

Khan didn't say a word, and I bowed my head, closing my eyes. How could McCoy do this to me? After promising he'd be better, he thought it was justifiable if he tortured Khan, a direct violation of Starfleet's regulations towards prisoners! more importantly, it was against what I wanted, but he could he have known that?

Did I care about Khan? Or was it just anger at McCoy that drove me towards him? I was in so much pain, I could barely stand it. Another man, letting me down, stepping away from me when I needed them the most.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Khan standing behind me, his hand extended tentatively, hovering over my shoulder. He looked like he was debating whether or not to touch me, but when he saw me watching him, he dropped his hand and his head, lowering his eyes in shame. Part of me wanted him to touch me, to hold me, but I said nothing. I turned back around and faced him, blushing slightly as I came in close quarters with his bare chest. "Why are you doing this?" I whispered, staring at his abs.

"Doing what?" He replied, his voice deep and comforting again, and I found myself not objecting when he put his arms around me, similar to what McCoy did. I let him hold me, silently reveling at his strength, the way his arms were tight and strong with muscle. Keeping me safe.

"Being nice to me," I said softly, still keeping my head down. "After everything that the world has done to you, after what you've been through, even now. They hurt you, they tortured you, and you...you're being kind to me. You're able to be kind. Why?"

"Because you've been hurt," He said softly, his voice surprisingly compassionate. "Because you need someone, you trust too easily, you trust too quickly, and you get hurt every time by it. And you need something, someone to hold onto."

I didn't know what to say, because he was exactly right. He had only known me for about thirty-six hours, and already he knew me better than McCoy ever had.

"Bryn..." He said quietly, and I looked up, my eyes large and still swimming with tears. I met his eyes, once fierce and piercing, frightening. Now they were soft and gentle, gazing down onto mine. I was lost in them.

Without another word, he leaned in and kissed me. Every nerve in my brain screamed that this was wrong, that he was evil and wrong. He had killed hundreds of people, but something in him had changed, something had to have changed. No way could the same man who was the most wanted person in the universe be able to feel like this, be able to love like this.

My heart let him in, let me kiss him back, and shut off my brain. He was gentle, but still strong, slowing down and holding back, I could tell, because he was just as nervous and scared as I was.

Suddenly, I heard a noise out in the hall and bolted backwards, my heart palpitating. "I never should have done that." I breathed, now terrified. "Oh, God...that was way out of line. I never should have...I broke so many rules..."

"Bryn, calm down, no one saw," Khan said quietly. I was still freaking out. I had kissed a mass murderer! Right after I'd unofficially left McCoy, now I was falling into the arms of the most hated man in the universe! I was associating with the enemy, and I was a slut!

"I shouldn't have - "

"Bryn, look at me," He said, his voice firm. I found myself listening to him, still jumpy with fear. But something about him commanded attention. "You weren't out of line, I was. I'll take the fall for any trouble you get in. Blame it on me, I was the one who kissed you."

"No..." I shook my head, turning away. "We can never speak of this, ever again. I never should have..."

"Do you regret it?" Khan's voice was dark again, his tone serious.

"What?"

"Do you regret it, Bryn?" Khan asked, almost timidly. "Do you regret...kissing me?"

I was quiet for a while, then finally I spoke. "No," I said quietly, and Khan softly sighed with relief, even smiling a little. "I'm not. But...no one can know. No one can ever know."

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	5. Chapter 5

**I'm honestly amazed at the support this is getting! 800+ views! Holy cow! It's so cool looking at the traffic chart and seeing where all my readers are from. Thank you so much again!**

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Chapter Five-

The next morning, I was called down to the front deck to speak to the Captain. I instantly knew I was in for it. Kirk had found out, and I was going to be kicked off the ship, stripped of my doctorate, expelled from Starfleet, thrown into prison. I curled my fingers around each other nervously as I entered the deck.

"Captain," I greeted him with a shaking voice.

"Dr. O'Connelly," He smiled at me. Only a few people were on deck, Sulu, Uhura and Chekhov. Thankfully McCoy wasn't around.

"Bones told me what was going on," Kirk said kindly, and I froze, thinking he was going to reprimand me for Khan. "Between you two." I swallowed.

"You have nothing to worry about, Captain," I gave a formal smile. "I can assure you that whatever had happened between us is gone now. He is a colleague, and nothing more."

"Can we...speak as friends, Dr. O'Connelly?" He asked, lowering his voice. "Bones is a good friend of mine, and he's hurt by this."

"Well after what you did to Khan last night, don't act like he's done nothing to deserve it." I snapped, loud enough for Sulu to hear.

"About that - " Kirk's face grew serious, and my stomach plummeted. "I know what happened, between you two. We all saw it on the security cameras." I felt my face grow red, but kept my gaze on him.

"What are you going to do to me?" I said softly. It wasn't a taunt, but merely a question.

"I don't know, Bryn," Kirk shook his head, looking away. "Technically, that's treason, and you could be thrown in jail for that. But at the same time, what Sulu, McCoy and I did was about ten times worse. I'll forget about the kiss if you forget about what we did. Is that a deal?"

"A kees!?" Chekhov cried, and I forgot he was sitting right there. Uhura was pretending not to listen, and Sulu stared stonily ahead. But Chekhov looked dismayed. "You keesed Khan?"

"Excuse me," I said firmly, and he pulled back, biting his lower lip. "Deal." I told Kirk, even though in no way was it fair.

"Thank you, Bryn," He smiled in relief, and suddenly the doors slid open, and there was McCoy, looking livid.

"Jim, you didn't fix anything!" He cried angrily, and I realized he had been listening to the whole thing.

"Bones!?" I cried in fury. "You son of a bitch, you set me up!" I marched towards him and smacked him across the face as hard as I could, sending his head whipping to the side. I was completely out of line, but I no longer cared. "I hate you!"

"Bryn!" McCoy's face was furious, and before I could even calm down, Kirk had thrown me behind him, blocking McCoy from getting to me. McCoy's face melted all of a sudden, and he looked like the hurt man that Kirk knew. "I deserved that." He admitted. "Bryn, I'm sorry. I was so wrong."

"You say that every time, and every time you turn around and do something worse!" I shouted. "When can you see that I can't forgive you?"

"Captain, transmission coming through," Uhura interrupted.

"Respond," Kirk replied. "Bones, and Bryn, please keep things under control." I sighed, and marched out of the room, letting the doors slide shut behind me as Admiral Marcus appeared on the screen behind me.

I went to the only place I knew I could find solace, and that was Khan's cell. I found him awake, this time fully clothed again, and ran to the glass, pressing my hands against the wall. "Khan," I cried, and he ran over to me, pressing his hands opposite mine.

"Bryn, what's going on?" He asked, concerned. "You're upset."

"Kirk knows," I breathed. "About us. They all saw us...kissing. Security cameras. They know." Khan sighed, looking down for a moment.

"What do you want to do?" He asked quietly. "You'll be punished for this."

"I won't be punished if I don't tell about what they did to you," I breathed. "I know that's not fair, but I don't want to risk never seeing you again." We were quiet for a long time, our foreheads pressed up agains the glass. I wanted to touch him, to feel the contours of his strong body, not a wall.

I happened to look up, and saw a man standing in the door, clad in blue. His face was clouded in heartbreak, and his right cheek was exceptionally red. "How much did you see?" I asked, and Khan looked out at McCoy, acknowledging his presence, but not breaking his position.

"Enough. I need Khan," McCoy said, his voice wavering. I knew he was hurting, and in a horrible way that made me happy.

"No," I said firmly. "You can't hurt him."

"It's not for me," McCoy said sadly, staring at Khan's hand over mine. "Admiral Marcus wants him. Starfleet orders."

"They'll kill him," I turned back to Khan. "They can't take you."

"This was going to happen," Khan said solemnly. "And you knew it, Bryn. Arrest me, doctor." Khan put his hands up in the air, and McCoy unlocked the cell doors. He walked in and roughly wrenched Khan's wrists into handcuffs, but Khan didn't even fight. I walked in after McCoy and stopped in front of Khan.

"I don't care if everyone knows," I murmured, and kissed him gently on the lips, closing my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at McCoy. "I love you."

"Bryn," He murmured softly. "If only things were-" He never got to finish, after the ship suddenly jerked violently, and we all went flying.

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	6. Chapter 6

**A thousand plus views! I honestly can't believe it, thank you! Note: I only saw this movie once, so if I don't get every detail right, forgive me. After this chapter, I'm going to be changing some things, so I figured I'd tell you all now so no one gets mad (and if you do, too bad, this is fanfiction haha) Again, huge love to all my readers! Enjoy!**

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Chapter Six-

I went flying through the air and crashed into something soft, well, softer than the floor or the walls of the ship. After my head stopped spinning, I got my bearings and realized I was lying on top of McCoy, my arms folded like a cat's on top of his chest. He looked dazed, and then looked up at me. I scowled, embarrassed, and then crawled off of him.

Khan was lying in a corner, his arms positioned uncomfortably because of his bound hands. I got to my feet and helped him stand. "Is everyone alright?" I shouted to the whole room, and gradually, people began to sit up.

"What the hell was that?" McCoy shouted, and I stepped closer to Khan.

"It appears the ship has been attacked..." One of the crew members ran into the room.

"By who?" McCoy demanded.

"It...it appears that Admiral Marcus has fired on the ship as we tried to warp out. The Captain and Marcus are arguing..." The man's eyes fell on Khan, and I saw the latter swallow.

"Say what needs to be said," Khan said, an I reveled in how dignified he sounded. He was so brave...

"Marcus wants you," The man looked uncomfortable with Khan staring at him. "You're a weapon, but Captain Kirk refused. We tried to warp back to Earth, but now the Enterprise is damaged. We're stuck."

Suddenly, the doors slid open and the Captain came running in, breathing hard. "Scotty caused a power outage on the Vengeance...we have to get to the ship and shut it down...Marcus is going to start a war..."

"You're making no sense, man!" McCoy shouted. "What the hell was Scotty doing on that ship?"

"Following coordinates I gave him," Kirk rested his hands on his knees. "Which I got from you." He pointed at Khan. "You're coming with me."

"What? Why?" I demanded, stepping closer to Khan.

"Release him," Kirk ordered. "He knows the ship - he designed it. We're going to space jump onto the bridge of the ship."

"Impossible," Khan's handcuffs were removed and he massaged his wrists. "From this distance? We'd never make it."

"I've done it before," Kirk said, and I knew that was a lie. It had to be. "Suit up with me. We leave in fifteen minutes."

"Come on," Soldiers grabbed Khan by the arms, propelling him towards the door. "Captain's orders."

"Bryn," He turned his head over his shoulder, calling my name. I ran up to him, weaseling my way through the ranks of the men to get to him. "I'll be alright," He murmured, as if he could read my mind. "Don't worry about me."

I swallowed, and reached for his hand, squeezing hard. "Please be safe. If you...if you cooperate, maybe you can be pardoned, and then...then I don't know..." I was babbling now, nervous, because it was very possible that Khan could die. "Come back, alright?" I looked up at him, and he kissed my forehead, in front of everybody.

"We'll see each other again," He promised, and was escorted out of sight.

* * *

I was left alone again on the ship, while we waited for news. Waiting was the worse part, because I didn't have any way of knowing whether Khan was dead or alive. I paced the front deck nervously. Chekhov, Sulu and Uhura all sat at their controls in patient silence, Spock in the Captain's chair, and McCoy sitting near the back. I walked back and forth, pressing my lips tightly together. I was shaky and I felt sick to my stomach. Had they made it inside yet?

"Will you stop that?" Sulu snapped at me, clearly irritated. I knew the only reason he didn't like me was because I had discovered him hurting Khan. He didn't want the stain on his record. "You're driving me crazy."

I gave him a dirty look, and opened my mouth, about to speak, when McCoy interrupted. "Leave her alone, Sulu."

"Why are you sticking up for me?" I cried, spinning around to face McCoy. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"

"Because as much as you think I don't, I still care about you," He said, his expression fixed, his eyes passionate. "And I understand you're upset, so Sulu, leave her _alone_. But Bryn...just answer me this: why Khan? Anyone else, I can see - maybe. But Khan? Over me? He's a mass murderer, Bryn! Thousands dead, because of him. Can you possibly love a man like that?"

"You don't know him..." I said weakly.

"I know that he isn't afraid to take someone's life, Bryn!" McCoy was yelling again, and I felt my lower lip quiver. _Do not cry...do not cry... _"Can you get past whatever you find attractive about him and see the monster that he is?!"

"Stop eet!" We all looked down to see Chekhov, of all people standing up at his post, looking angry. "Docteer McCoy, why can't you get past ze fact zat she eesn't coming back to you! You are so frustrating - bicker! bicker! all ze time because you can't get over yourself! When weel you see? She ees over you!"

Everyone stared at him for a moment, and I had to suppress laughter at his wide eyes and angry expression. McCoy was staring at him with his mouth hanging open, and Sulu wasn't much different. Uhura looked mildly bemused, one hand over her mouth.

"Thank you, Mr. Chekhov," I smiled at him appreciatively, and sighed. "My thoughts exactly."

"Both Dr. O'Connelly and Mr. Chekhov raise a logical point, Dr. McCoy," Spock said in his usual factual manner. "It is unwise to waste your efforts on a woman who - if not unwisely so - has chosen another."

"Shut up, pointy," McCoy growled, and stormed out of the room. I watched the doors shut behind him before turning back to Chekhov.

"Thanks for that," I said, with relief. "He can just be...you know."

"Sometimes you need a friend," Chekhov smiled, but I only felt slightly better.

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**Okay, sorry that this one isn't that exciting, but the next chapter is going to be much more interesting, I promise :) Now I'm going to talk about something in my life, so feel free to scroll through if you want (but please don't forget to review! :p) **

**Right now there is a massive storm where I live and we're on flash flood and tornado warnings. Last week there was a really big tornado threat where I live, and we were called off the busses and in a tornado lock-down at my school. I was terrified; I honestly thought we were going to die, so now I'm scared again because I don't want there to be a tornado...but anyway...**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven-

It was a long time before I convinced myself to go back to my quarters, and even then, I retreated back to the deck multiple times, just to check for news. Eventually, Chekhov got up, smiling patiently, and escorted me to my room, saying gently, "I weel notify you if we receive any updates on ze Keptain and Khan's condeetion."

"Thank you, Chekhov," I smiled, and it felt forced, fake. He left, and I sat down on my bed, staring at the wall. I felt horrible about myself. I knew McCoy cared about me, but it was killing me how he was acting like this, insisting that he wasn't the problem. More than anything, though, I was disappointed in him. I had always thought that he was better than that, better than persecuting a man for information. He was a doctor, for goodness's sake!

Still, my mind couldn't help but wander to the time when we first met in the Starfleet Academy, in medical training. We were all given assignments for our first task in partners, and I was placed with him. Our assignment was to deliver octuplets via caesarean-section in a wampa, a daunting task, seeing as though I'd never done it before. I was nervous about delivering offspring of an alien species, and even more so when I saw the confident, handsome man who was to be my partner.

"Bryn O'Connelly, right?" He smiled at me, seeming so boyish and carefree then. "They've said a lot of good things about you."

"Really?" I replied, injecting painkillers. "Like what?"

"That you're the most beautiful cadet here," He teased, and I remembered how hot my cheeks felt. "And a pretty damn good doctor too." At the end of the delivery, both of us were covered in sweat and blood, and flirting and laughing like we'd known each other for ages. He'd slipped his number in my medicine bag, and I'd found it after I'd gotten back to my dorm.

I discovered tears in my eyes, to my horror. Why couldn't he be like the man I'd fallen so hard, so fast for back then? Why, at the threat of another man, did he transform into a jealous monster, going so far as to actively participate in the other man's torture?

Tears fell down my face, and I began to cry quietly into my pillow, praying that no one would hear me again.

* * *

After the tears were gone, Chekhov ran into my room, out of breath and excited. "Dr. O'Connelly!" He cried, and I sat up, praying that the remnants of my tears weren't on my face. "Eet ees Khan."

"Where is he?" I sat up instantly, smoothing down my hair. "He's aright?"

"Docteer," Chekhov looked grave. "I don't know how to tell you zis wizout upsetting you..."

"Is he dead?!" I cried, tears welling up in my eyes again.

"No," Chekhov looked uncomfortable. "But...he has taken over ze Vengeance."

"With Captain Kirk?" I was confused.

"No...Dr. O'Connelly, Khan helped to oversrow Admeeral Marcus, and then he keeled him," I gasped, my hands covering my mouth instinctively. This was wrong. Khan had changed. He wouldn't do this. "Khan has taken over Keptain Kirk, and Scotty, as well as Carol Marcus. He - he ees requesting to see you, docteer."

"Then let's go," I ran with Chekhov down the halls to the control room, where Spock, Sulu, Uhura and McCoy were all waiting. McCoy turned as I walked in with Chekhov, his face pained.

Khan was up on the screen, looking intimidating and quite honestly, evil. His face softened when he saw me, but only slightly. "Khan, is it true?" I asked quietly. "Is...is Marcus dead?"

"Yes," He said, his voice dark and menacing. I wasn't relieved to see him, I was scared.

"And - and you killed him?" I didn't want to hear it, didn't want to hear him say it -

"Yes," Khan swallowed, his composure dignified. He was the captain of the Vengeance now. He began to address all of us. "But the others are alive - Montgomery Scot, Carol Marcus, and your Captain. I am willing to offer you an exchange. Their lives for the members of my crew in the torpedoes. I want them all beamed to my ship."

"That can be arranged," Spock said smoothly.

"And one more condition," Khan said. "You beam Doctor Bryn O'Connelly aboard the ship. I want her here first, to ensure your compliance to the terms. Are we agreed?"

"No way in hell are we sending her over there," McCoy said defiantly, glaring at Khan.

"That decision is not yours, _doctor,"_ Khan sneered. "Might I remind you of your place with the surplus of weapons I have aboard this ship?"

"Dr. O'Connelly," Spock turned to me. "This is a decision only you can make."

I looked around at the faces of those around me. McCoy, looking worried, afraid, panicked, defensive, brave, and ready to fight, all at once. Chekhov, staring at me, his eyes large and sad. He looked so innocent, so young there, that I wanted to hold him close and just squeeze him tight. If I went, I'd never see them again, but if I didn't go, the deal would be off, the crew would be killed, and there would be absolute war against Khan.

I had to give up everything.

"I'll go with you," I told Khan. "But you have to promise, _promise me,_ that you won't hurt any more people. Promise me that you will spare the crew."

"I promise," Khan vowed, and pressed a few buttons on the controls. On the teleporting pad, three figures began to materialize, and gold circles of light began to appear all over my body.

"Bryn!" McCoy shouted, running towards me, his hand extended. I reached for him, terrified, and then landed on the deck of a ship unfamiliar to me. The floor was ice cold, and I was next to a body.

Upon closer examination, I saw the body had an Admiral's uniform, and the body's head...

I screamed and screamed and screamed.

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**Ugh, that head-crushing scene in the movie was just nasty p Anyway, I hope you're enjoying it so far! Please review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Two. Thousand. Views. It hasn't even been a full week! Love to all my readers, favoriters, followers, and reviewers!**

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Chapter Eight-

"Bryn! Bryn! Are you alright?" I heard McCoy's voice, but how was that even possible? I was on Khan's ship now. "Bryn!"

"Oh God...oh my dear God..." I moaned, unable to take my eyes off of Admiral Marcus's body. His head...

"Just look away," I felt Khan's hands on my arms, trying to steer me away from the body. "Don't look at it."

"Don't touch me!" I screamed, pulling away. I saw communication with the Enterprise was still open; the screen still showed the faces of the crew, with the edition of Captain Kirk, Carol Marcus, and Scotty.

"Dr. O'Connelly, are you safe?" Kirk asked authoritatively.

"Admiral Marcus..." I managed, hysterical. I was a doctor, I should be able to handle this! With all the events though, and lack of sleep, I wasn't able to calm down. Khan had just crushed that man's head with his bare hands...

"Bryn, try and calm down," Kirk changed his voice; now it was calmer and softer. I had to quiet down to listen to him. "We're going to come and get you, just-"

"No you're not," Khan said, his upper lip curling. "Goodbye Captain."

"Khan, wait!" I cried, but he had already turned off the transmission. I swallowed, shaking like a leaf, and backed up into a wall, forcing myself not to look down. Slowly, Khan turned to face me, and I was terrified at what he might do to me.

"I had to do it," He finally said.

"No you didn't," I said, trying to sound brave. "You never have to kill somebody. There's always another option -"

"I had to avenge what he did to me and my crew-"

"Always," I said pointedly. "Another option. And you...in the most painful way imaginable...in front of his daughter..."

"Bryn, I lost everything," He said, his voice thick with emotion. "I don't want to lose you." I was quiet for a moment, taking deep breaths.

"Admiral Marcus awoke me from suspended animation to design this ship," Khan began to explain. He told me the entire story, how Marcus had used his friends to manipulate him into doing what he wanted, which was start a war between the Klingons and the Federation. When Khan had tried to protect his crew by hiding them in the torpedoes, he had been forced into exile, made into a public enemy and put on the most wanted list. The reason why he attacked the Star Fleet conference was because he believed his crew to be dead at the hands of Marcus, and wanted to avenge their deaths. At the end of his speech, he was visibly shaking, his hands braced on the edge of a table. Khan's voice was dark and thick with emotion, and I watched him with sympathy. I knew the whole story now, and that calmed me down some. "I know that you think I am some sort of terrible beast Bryn," He said quietly. "And I suppose I am...but I was designed to be terrible. It's all I've ever known."

"But you can change," I said earnestly. "I know you can, I've seen you! You can be compassionate, and kind, and the man that I fell in love with! I know you're better than murder, Khan."

"All my life, I was taught this way, Bryn," He moved towards me, passionate, angry. "To fight, to kill. They _bred_ me to kill. I was...I am a weapon, not a person, Bryn." It broke my heart to hear these words coming from him. "I was raised in a lab. I didn't know the people who donated their gametes, and no one would ever tell me." Khan abruptly turned around, facing the window. His shoulders rose up and down rapidly, and I timidly stepped up to his side.

"Khan, I'm sorry," I slid my hand into his. Both of ours shook.

"When they say I'm a monster...they're right," Khan's voice was choked with emotion. "I don't know how to be different; I _want_ to be. I don't _want_ to despise this world I live in, I don't want to despise myself with every fiber of my being." A tear shot down Khan's cheek, and he didn't wipe it away.

"Ohh..." I murmured gently, almost maternally, and touched his cheek with one hand, turning his face down towards mine. "Sweetheart, you're wrong. You are _not_ a monster, not at all."

"They all believe I am-"

_"Show_ them that you aren't," I pressed, stepping up to his chest. "Make them see the man that you are. You can, Khan, I know you can. Let them see that you are good, that you're better than the one's who raised you."

"Bryn," His voice was tight, and I felt ready to cry. I wrapped him in my arms, even though he was much taller than me, and held him close, resting my head on his chest. Khan crumpled slightly, allowing himself to deflate, and lean on me a little. He was so broken, I realized, broken and alone. I knew I could never leave him, not now, not ever. "I'm so sorry," He was crying softly now, and I stepped back, taking his face in my hands. His tears ran over my fingers. "I will never be good enough for you."

"Yes you will," I murmured quietly. "You already are." I kissed him then, first gently and softly, and then stronger, more passionately. I wrapped my arms around his neck, diving into him. Khan's strength seemed to return again, and he wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me up on top of a table. I kissed away his tears that had run down his cheeks, slowly and gently, caressing his jaw with a set of fingers.

"I think I love you, Bryn," He said quietly, and now it was time for me to cry.

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**Thanks for all of the support guys! Love ya! Review :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Six days and almost 3,000 views. That's insane, and the best any one of my stories has done for that amount of time. Love you and all thank you so much!**

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Chapter Nine-

Khan and I explored the ship. Khan already knew what it looked like, having designed it himself, but I didn't. He gave me a Captain's tour, and I held his hand the whole time.

I was made into First Mate, and given the respective quarters. Part of me wanted Khan to take me into his arms and hold me as I slept, but I didn't ask.

I was exhausted, and fell asleep quickly. I dreamed of McCoy standing on the deck of the Enterprise, wearing yellow. He was the Captain, smiling gallantly and bravely. Everyone was safe and happy and smiling...

I was awakened with a gloved hand pressed over my mouth, and my eyes grew wide as I screamed under than palm. A man in uniform was standing over me, clad in blue...

"Bryn, relax, it's just me," McCoy said gently, his voice urgent under the layers of softness.

"Why are you here?" I asked when he removed his hand, sitting up. "What are you doing?"

"I've come to rescue you!" He whispered, taking my hand and pulling me to my feet. "Come on, I'll beam you back to the Enterprise."

"No!" I cried. "McCoy, don't do this, or the treaty is completely off! Khan will come after you, and he'll kill you all! You need to beam back to the Enterprise now!"

"Bryn, don't be stubborn," McCoy flipped open his intercom. "Captain, I have Bryn."

"Wrong," We both turned towards the door, and Khan was standing there, holding a gun aimed at McCoy. He didn't need it. "Explain what you're doing on my ship, McCoy."

"A rescue mission," McCoy said bravely. "You have a Starfleet doctor in captivity. You have more than you could possibly want. I'm taking Dr. O'Connelly back to the Enterprise."

"You will do no such thing," Khan stepped into the room. "We had a deal."

"McCoy, go back," I pleaded. "You're wasting your time."

"What do you mean?" He looked like he was upset but like he was hiding it. "You aren't saying you want-"

"To stay," I said firmly. "I'm staying with him." I took a deep breath through my nose and continued. "Dr. McCoy, it's over now. I've chosen him."

"That's too bad," He growled and reached out, grabbing me by the waist and crushing me to him. McCoy flipped open his com-link. "McCoy to Enterprise, beam-"

Khan had grabbed the com link from his hands and in one swift motion snapped it in half with one hand and threw it onto the ground. "You'll pay for this, you dishonorable bastard." He advanced towards McCoy, his teeth bared with anger, and slammed him up against the wall.

"Khan, stop it," I said darkly, but with a sinking realization I knew that he was past saving.

"You think that whatever is out there is yours, that you can have all you want," Khan snarled, and McCoy struggled under his grip, kicking and punching Khan in vain. "That you can just _take_ everything you want. You don't realize everything has a _price." _Khan suddenly seized McCoy's wrist, wrenching his arm back at a horrible angle. McCoy screamed in agony, and I knew his arm was broken, probably dislocated too.

"Look at me!" I screamed at Khan, but it was like he couldn't hear me, couldn't see me. This wasn't supposed to happen, he was supposed to be getting better...

"I will kill you!" Khan delivered a punishing kick, so hard I swore I could have heard a rib snap. McCoy groaned, in considerable agony, I was positive.

"Please..." He begged, collapsing down on the floor. Khan shoved his boot on top of his head.

"I'll relish in your cries of mercy as you die beneath my boot," Khan gave a wicked grin, as he began to press down on McCoy's skull. I stepped up beside Khan and leaned up close to his ear and whispered softly.

"I love you," I murmured. "But you have to stop this. Kill him, and you kill me as well."

"Bryn..." McCoy choked out, spitting up blood. This was bad, really bad, because he was bleeding internally. He would die if he didn't get help. "Don't."

"Khan, listen to me," I murmured, pulling away slightly. "If you kill him, I will never forgive you. I told you I love you, and I didn't lie. I do. I love the man that is kind, and compassionate, the man who has a heart. I love the man who, when life has given him so much pain, can still love like the best of men. I love you, Khan, as terrible as you think you are.

"But you terrify me. The man you can transform into frightens me. Right now, I'm frightened, because you're letting yourself be the weapon, the monster that the scientists designed you to be. _And I know that isn't you_. Please, Khan, come back to me. I know you're there."

Khan was silent, staring down at McCoy, his chest rising and falling as he breathed through his teeth. His posture, his stance was menacing but his eyes showed his pain, his heart breaking inside.

Khan removed his foot, and I flew to McCoy's side, kneeling down beside him. My doctor's instinct was kicking in now, and checked his vitals quickly. "What hurts?" I asked breathlessly. "Tell me right now."

"My chest..." More blood oozed from his lips, and as carefully as I could, I turned him onto his back. "Blood...Lungs...Broken ribs..."

"Got it," I said fixedly. "Listen to me Bones, there isn't much time. I think...I think one of your ribs, or maybe more is puncturing your lungs. I just need to look at it, alright?" My voice was gentle, and I turned back to Khan. He was standing there in fear at Bones, looking horrified at what he had done. "Go find a doctor or medical personnel!" I ordered sharply. "There has to be some aboard this ship! Go!"

Khan looked at me, and I saw the distress in his eyes before he bolted away. I turned back to Bones and ripped his shirt down the center of his chest, ignoring the fact that I was seeing him bare-chested for the first time. His chest was heavily bruised where Khan had kicked him. "Okay," I took a deep breath through my nose and exhaled out my mouth. "You're going to be just fine."

Just then, the medical team burst into the room, carrying a stretcher. "His left arm is dislocated and fractured, and he's coughing up blood. His ribs are most likely broken, and I believe that he has pneumothorax-"

"Hold on a second!" One of the doctors said harshly. "Who the hell are you?"

"A pretty...damn good doctor..." Bones said firmly. "The best in Starfleet. And she's going to fix my lung."

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**I actually had to look up all that stuff on internal bleeding and that stuff. Pneumothorax is a collapsed lung. Anyway, hope you're enjoying so far, and don't forget to review! Xoxox **


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten-

After long hours in surgery, I'd fixed up McCoy's lung, and then reset his arm. He'd been put under anesthesia, and was still unconscious. His condition was stable now, and I was relieved for that.

I emerged from the surgery room, blood on my gloves and forearms, and in great need of sleep. Khan was waiting for me, a somber expression on his face.

"Does he live?" He asked solemnly.

"Of course he lives," I would normally be offended by the question. I'd never let a patient die. But I was way too tired to even be upset with Khan.

"Good," Khan sighed, looking down at his chest.

"I want to land," I said after a minute of awkward silence.

"Land?" He repeated, looking up. "The closest planet is Aquarius Seven - a water planet, but still advanced. There are places to land, and I'm sure hospitals for the doctor to recuperate."

"Good," I muttered, stripping off my gloves and scrubs and tossing them on the floor, not caring anymore. "I'm exhausted. I'm going to sleep."

"I'll give the order to land," Khan said, and I longed for him to stop being so rigid with me, so formal, like he was afraid of upsetting me. I turned and trudged back to my quarters, passing out on my bed.

But as exhausted as I was, I couldn't fall asleep. Images of Khan beating McCoy flashed through my mind, followed by McCoy delivering the volts of electricity to Khan, hearing Khan's deep - throated screams of pain. I heard McCoy choking out my name under Khan's boot, and the words Khan had murmured to me last night, his face covered in tears. "I think I love you, Bryn."

Both were dangerous in their own way, I realized, and curled the sheets on the blanket close to my chest, right over my heart. All I realized now, was that I wanted to go home.

But there was no home to go to. Not anymore...

I pushed the thoughts out of my head, ignoring my mother's tears, and my brother's rage. I forced myself to ignore my father's headstone, pure, white marble, sticking out of the ground.

The tears came easily, now that I was alone, and I buried my face into the pillow, letting myself cry. I hated crying now, because I was a doctor, I was in Starfleet, and I was supposed to look towards the future, not allowing my dead family to weigh me down. It was a sign of weakness, not release.

I was so caught up in my emotions, I didn't hear the door slide open. I didn't hear the soft steps of the boots on the floor, nor the sound of someone sitting down on the bed beside me. Not until I felt the large, warm hand on my shoulder, did I flinch, and acknowledge Khan's presence beside me.

"Bryn," He said, his voice soft, but uncertain.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out, because it was the only response I could think of.

"No..." He murmured, and I made myself look up at him, my eyes puffy and red from sobbing. "Bryn, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"I can't deal with this anymore," I murmured, sitting up. It took the last of my strength. Khan looked alarmed for a moment, and I continued on. "With the running, the hiding, the constant conflict between you and McCoy. I don't want you to be on the Most Wanted List, and I don't want them to kill you when they capture you. And yes, I'm absolutely terrified of that happening, because it _will _and I just don't want to lose you." I began sobbing again, and he drew me into his arms, without saying a word. I clung to his shirt, crying like a child, and burying my head into his chest. For a moment, I just wanted to be weak, throw out the facade of strength and let my crumbling, broken self show through.

"Bryn, I've hurt you," Khan breathed, sounding horrified at himself. "Look at this...I hurt you."

"Don't..." I murmured. "Please, just don't ever leave.."

"Look at me, Bryn," Khan cupped my face in his hands, tilting it upwards so I'd meet his eyes. "For as long as I live, I will never ever leave you. Until you order me away, I will always stay by your side. Bryn, you make me into a better person, and I love you for that. With you, I...I'm human, I suppose. I feel whole with you." Khan was silent for a while. "What I'm trying to say is I need you, as much as you need me. Probably more, though, because I literally have nothing."

"My whole family is dead," I blurted out. I don't know why I said it, but I somehow knew that he needed to know. "I grew up in a very poor section of earth. There was a lot of crime, a lot of gangs. These gangs killed my father when I was only eight years old. And my brother...he went after them, to avenge my father's death. The gangs killed him and my mother in our kitchen...right in front of me." I dashed away a tear. "When I was a teenager, I lived off the streets, making money any way I could, mostly by stealing. I tried to join the gangs, for protection, but everyone that I thought would look out for me, protect me, either betrayed me, or was killed.

"That's why I love too much, too easily," My voice was tight with emotion. "Because I've been alone for so much, for so long." I began to cry softly, with Khan's hands still on my face. My tears slid down his fingers. "I just don't want to be alone anymore."

"I will protect you, always," He promised, kissing my forehead, then my cheek, and finally my lips. "And I will never be taken from you. I can promise you that." He murmured, and kissed me again, his embrace soft and gentle. He dried my tears with his loving kisses, and held me against his chest, as I fell asleep, finally, no longer terrified of losing him.

* * *

I awoke in his arms, lying on my side. I faced him, and my head was on his chest. His arms were still loosely around me, and he slept still, his face relaxed and peaceful. I smiled, happy with the fact that he'd stayed with me the whole night, and kissed his cheek.

His eyes fluttered open in an instant, and he looked around, slightly dazed. "Bryn," He finally said softly.

"Khan..." I smiled up at him, and we kissed. He smiled under my lips, and I felt safe in his arms. "I love you."

"I love _you."_ He replied, sitting up and taking me with him. "I bet we're on Aquarius Seven already." He smiled, and we broke apart. I got up to go take a shower, and he left the room.

I let the hot water run down my back, and thought about how nice it would be to hide away in Aquarius Seven, away from Starfleet, away from everyone else. McCoy would recuperate, and everything would be fine again.

Renewed with hope, I got dressed again, and went down to the deck of the ship to join Khan. "There she is," He smiled. A brilliant, shimmering blue planet lay before us, and I could practically see the gentle waves lapping about. I took his hand. He addressed the crew. "Prepare to land!"

* * *

**I'll update tomorrow with more...review s'il vous plait! Ah mes français n'est pas mal, non? Hahah**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven-

We landed underwater, fully submerging the Vengeance into an underwater landing dock. Then, a tube was suctioned to the door of the ship, and we all exited into a submerged building. The walls were made of glass, which was several feet thick, I was told, to protect us from the water pressure.

The thing about Aquarius Seven's water was that it was crystal clear, like you would find in a swimming pool. You could see for miles in all directions, and various aquatic life swimming around.

A woman, or at least I presumed she was a woman, walked up to us. Her skin was a teal - color, her eyes large and inky black, and dressed in long, white, billowing robes. I noticed she had gills on either side of her neck.

"Welcome to Aquarius Seven," She said, her voice smooth and her accent clipped. "My name is Ayala. I will be your hostess during your stay."

"Thank you," Khan said smoothly. "There is a very injured man aboard our ship. I hope that your medical facilities will be able to accommodate him."

"Of course," Ayala said. "If you will allow us to enter your ship to retrieve him..."

"That is not necessary," Khan replied, firmly but still polite. "I will instruct members of my crew to bring him down."

"Fine," Ayala smiled. "Allow me to direct you to your living arrangements for your stay here."

* * *

Later that day, I went to visit McCoy in the hospital, a massive building that was, like everything else, completely underwater. McCoy's room had an entire wall made of glass, looking out into the massive ocean around us.

He had tubes through his nose and a massive plaster cast around his one arm. He was conscious however, and watching the view of the ocean from his place in bed.

"How are you feeling?" I asked gently, and he looked up.

"It hurts when I breathe, but they've given me drugs for the pain," He gave a grim smile. "Sit down, please."

"I can't stay long," I lied. "I have work to do on the ship." McCoy's face fell slightly, and I felt guilty. But I knew leading him on wouldn't help anyone. I had to strike the iron while it was hot, and extinguish every part of me that wanted to be with him.

"Of course," He nodded.

"I - I just wanted to see how you were doing," I felt the need to explain. "But you're doing well, and that's all that matters." I sounded like an idiot...

"Well thanks," He gave a closed smile. "Ah, I understand you're pressed for time, but how is Khan?"

"He's fine," I furrowed my eyebrows, unsure of what he was getting at.

"I just wanted to make sure he wasn't...you know," McCoy looked uncomfortable for a second. "Hurting you."

"He would never," I retorted without skipping a beat. That thought had never occurred to me. "Khan loves me. He'd never hurt me."

"Right," He swallowed. "Well, thanks for coming, Bryn. It, ah, means a lot..."

"Sure," I smiled at him. "I'll check up on you later," I promised, and exited the room. Instead of feeling better, I felt worse, guilty even. It was like our easy-going banter was forever gone now. I wandered the halls, exploring the massive underground amounts of passages and pathways, lost in my thoughts.

When suddenly, the entire building shook. The glass gave a strange jolt, bringing me to my knees, and vibrating the hall. My eyes panicked, and I got to my feet, running towards the nearest resident.

"What was that?!" I cried, alarmed.

"I don't know," A deep voice greeted me. "This has never happened before..." Another jolt rocked the room, and we both went flying.

"Khan!" I screamed, needing to find him. Something told me that this was not a natural occurrence. I began to sprint down the halls, towards his quarters, screaming his name.

I nearly collided with him when I passed my room. He grabbed me by both arms and held me out at arms length. "Bryn, you have to get back to the ship. This is an attack, and it's because I'm here."

"They've found us!" I cried, my stomach sinking. "Oh God..."

"Get back to the Vengeance," He said, his voice stern. "I'll be right behind you."

"I have to get McCoy," I breathed, then kissed his cheek. "I'll be right there."

I took off down the hall, towards the medical wing, desperate to find him. I burst into his room, and seized his bed, pulling it out of the room. The wheels squeaked on the linoleum floor. "What's happening?!" McCoy cried.

"We're being attacked," I said, breathing hard. "They've found Khan. We have to get out of here."

"Starfleet wouldn't directly attack a civilization, not like this," McCoy said, seizing his com link. "McCoy to Enterprise. Are you attacking Aquarius Seven? What the hell is going on?"

I reached the main lobby and found Khan there. He had a pair of wetsuits slung over his shoulder. "Put this on," He handed one to me, and I didn't hesitate, taking off my clothes in front of everyone and changing into it. I helped McCoy into his, which was difficult because of his cast.

"What is this for?" I asked.

"You'll have to do some swimming," Khan replied, grabbing McCoy's bed and wheeling it towards the landing bay. "The explosions have knocked the Vengeance from her landing position. There are already crew members aboard. When they see you, they'll let you in."

"Where's your wetsuit, Khan?" I asked, a sick feeling growing in my stomach. "You're coming too, aren't you."

"I have to round up the rest of my crew, but I swear, I'll be right behind you, Bryn," He said, his voice tight. "I love you, Bryn. Always know that."

"I love you too," We kissed, and I had to tell myself that this wasn't goodbye. I wheeled McCoy to the exit gate, and took the oxygen tank that was handed to me and fixed it over McCoy's mouth. I then adjusted mine, and lifted him out of his bed, with a bit of help.

"Let's do this," I muttered, taking a deep breath and pushing open the door.

* * *

The water was thick and heavy, but McCoy was heavier, and unable to propel himself much through the see. A flash of red light streamed down the ocean and struck the side of the dome. I saw cracks spread through the surface, like a spider's web.

I kicked, pushing through the water with one hand, my other wrapped around McCoy's chest. The Vengeance was about two hundred yards away, and slowly drifting away from me.

My heart was pacing, and I realized adrenaline was the only thing that was keeping me going. I wished I were bigger, stronger, faster. I wished I were like Khan.

We were about a hundred yards away.

My limbs began to ache, but I made myself ignore the pain. I knew McCoy was in a great deal. There were multiple flashes of light from lasers, and a look behind me told me that the dome was shattering, water pouring in from all sides. _Please let Khan be_ _out of there...Please let him be alive..._

We were seventy five yards away.

I felt McCoy shake my arm, and I saw him pointing, terrified at his oxygen tank. The tube pushing oxygen into his mouth had ripped, and he couldn't breathe. "No!" I screamed angrily, flailing about faster.

We were fifty yards away.

McCoy's face was turning blue, his cheeks swollen with air he was trying hard to hold onto. I had to get to the ship. The door was steadily drawing nearer...

We were twenty-five yards away.

McCoy had stopped fighting for air, now unconscious. I knew he'd drown if I wasn't fast enough but he was so heavy... I nearly burst into tears, I was so desperate. I had to get to the ship, or all would be lost. McCoy was close to death again, and I was responsible.

Five yards away, and the doors opened, washing us in with a flood of water, and then shut. I ripped off my oxygen mask and turned McCoy onto his back, beginning chest compressions. I had to put away his broken rib. His heart was what I needed.

"One...Two...Three..." I counted, exhausted. Tears of frustration shot down my face. "Wake up! You can't die!" I opened his mouth and gave two life breaths, and began again, chanting loudly, over and over. I did this for ages, it seemed, until finally McCoy's eyes snapped open, taking in a sharp breath of air before vomiting on the ground beside him.

I fell back in exhaustion, as crew members surrounded me. "Where is Khan?" I breathed. "Bring him to me."

"Captain Khan never boarded," A man said. "He instructed us to leave the planet as soon as you were on board."

I froze, not believing my ears. Khan wouldn't dare leave me... "No..."

"He must have stayed behind," The man continued. "And since you are first officer, you're the captain now."

* * *

**Just wanted to thank you all again for your continued support and all the kind reviews! Your support means everything to me, so thank you.**

**Also (and I don't know why I previously forgot this), to whomever wrote the review about the potato for Marcus's head, I laughed for a good five minutes at that; that was hilarious!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thanks to everyone for making this my most subscribed story! Love to all my new followers!**

* * *

Chapter Twelve-

I scrambled to my feet without a word, and began to run towards the bridge, my heart racing. I stopped next to the Captain's chair and stared out at the destruction before me.

The whole structure was crumbling, crushed by the waters weight. The natives were fine, able to breathe through the gills in their necks, but the foreigners were drowning, most already dead. Their bodies floated, limbs spread-eagled, faces vacant.

I couldn't find Khan. My eyes searched frantically around, trying to spot him in this mess, but everything was breaking, and there was so much chaos.

"Captain," A woman appeared at my side. "The starship Shovah is requesting contact."

"Open contact," I breathed, taking deep shaky breaths. I wasn't able to wrap my mind around the situation yet. Khan was down there, and Khan was dead...

The screen lit up with another ship's image, and I saw a very pale man sitting in the captain's chair. His hair was silvery blond and shaved very close to his skull. His eyes were inky black, and staring at me with an intensity I found alarming.

"Bryn O'Connelly," He addressed me, and I scowled.

"That is Captain O'Connelly to you," I said firmly. "Who is speaking?"

"My name is Halcyon, and I am commandeering the Shovah," He said smoothly. "I see that you have escaped from the wreckage."

"Indeed I have," I replied evenly. "Would you know the cause of this attack?" I had to fight to keep from screaming at him. I knew he was responsible, I just knew it...

"That would be me."

"That's a direct violation of Starfleet regulations; you have no right to _attack_ and destroy an entire city-"

"I _am_ Starfleet," Halcyon narrowed his eyes, cutting me off. I stifled a gasp.

"No way was that authorized," I breathed. "The Federation wouldn't..."

"We must have Khan-"

"Well he's dead," I spat, tears welling up in my eyes. I stiffened, drawing myself up straighter. "Are you happy? He's not on board with me, and he didn't make it." My voice caught on the last word, and I covered my mouth with one hand.

"You are wrong, Captain," Halcyon said, snidely, enjoying the fact that he knew something I didn't. "Khan is alive. I know, because I have him aboard my ship."

"Where is he?" I demanded, standing up. "What have you done to him?!"

"He is...alive-"

"Let me see him," I growled, shaking. "If you hurt him..."

"Khan was no match for me."

"How?!"

"Because I am super human too," Halcyon smirked. "In fact, his half-brother. Our father's are the same sperm donor. I know him better than anyone else. He wasn't difficult to capture, choking, drowning for air. And then we tussled a bit, as brothers do, but he was weak, and he has always been weak, Bryn."

"Why are you telling me this?" I snarled, furious. "To rub it in? Where is Khan?"

"If you insist," Halcyon shut his eyes, as if I were an annoying headache that wouldn't go away. He reached down, seized something and with a violent jerk, brought his hand up again.

Khan was unconscious, dried blood all over his face and neck. His hair was still soaking wet, as were his clothes, which were torn and dirty. He groaned a little, slowly waking, and opened and shut his mouth a few times before opening his eyes.

"Ugh, my hands," He moaned, raising a pair of heavy shackles to his face. Then he saw me. "Bryn, you're safe."

"Oh, God," I breathed. "Khan, how do you feel?"

"You're okay?" He asked again. "You're out of Aquarius Seven? That's all that matters."

"Yes, I'm safe, but he hurt you," I looked up at Halcyon, fire burning in my eyes. "Look at him, he's half dead," I spat. "How could you have done this? To your own brother!"

"Bryn, it's alright," Khan said calmly. "Look at me. I want you to listen. What's going to happen next is going to be very hard, I know. But they're going to try me and execute me. I'm going to die, and that means breaking the most important promise in the world, and that is leaving you.

"You have to understand that giving myself up is the hardest thing I've ever done. But I must be punished for my crimes. And now, I accept that punishment, but with a heavy heart, because I will never have you again. You have made me into a better man, Bryn, and I realize that this is what I must do." Khan paused for a moment, his voice now thick with emotion. He ran a chained palm down his face. "I love you, so, so much. You make me human, you make me into a man, not a beast. And I will never, ever forget you."

"You could have gone with us," I murmured, tears soaking my face. "Why didn't you go with us?"

"There were two oxygen tanks and wetsuits," He explained. "I had every intention to go with you, but once I saw McCoy, I knew you'd never forgive me if we left him behind. I had to save you."

"I love you," I blurted out, my face distorted with tears. Silent sobs threatened to take over my body and destroy me. "You amazing, selfless, beautiful man, I love you, and I will always love you."

"I need you to be happy, and I need you to be safe," Khan continued, his eyes displaying every ounce of his pain. "I can't ever guarantee your safety when I'm around you, and if you were to be hurt in anyway, it would kill me inside. I know this is hurting you beyond belief, and I'm sorry Bryn." A tear streaked down his cheek and he caught it with his thumb. "I am so, so sorry. But I had too."

"Khan..." I wept openly, throwing aside my dignity. "I will never forget you."

"I know, Bryn," He swallowed, his larynx rising and falling dramatically. "And I will never forget you. I will always, always love you-"

"Alright, enough of that," Halcyon brutally shoved Khan to the floor of the ship and I screamed his name. "See you on Earth, Bryn."

The screen went black, and I stared at it in awe, feeling more broken than ever. "I'll come for you," I breathed, taking in shaky, sobbing breaths. "I will find you again, Khan."


	13. Chapter 13

**I apologize in advance if I don't update every day. I've got finals now and state testing next week so it's a bit hectic. But I get out on the twelfth, so my updates will be more regular then. I update when I can. Anyway, I hope you're enjoying the story so far, and thanks for all the support!**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen-

I sat in the Captain's chair, my face behind a lace of my fingers. My heart felt like it had been ripped from my chest, and every emotion that had been attached to it was pouring like blood from an open wound from it.

I was furious that Halcyon had taken Khan from me, that I was unable to do anything as he hurt him, beat him, made him suffer. I loathed Halcyon for betraying his own brother.

I was crushed and miserable that Khan was being taken from me, and that he was going to die. I had no doubt that he would be put to death after his trial, and that I would never see him again. I couldn't think of a word to describe my sadness, because I was now alone again.

The deck was dead silent, and I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I didn't want to look up, because I'd have to acknowledge them all.

Slowly, though, I stood, sniffing back my tears and raising my head high. "Someone track the course of the Shovah." I said, feigning strength. My voice was still a bit shaky, but I had to be strong. "And request communication with the Enterprise. I want to speak to Captain Kirk."

Instantly, people began doing as I said, and I was slightly amazed at the fact that there was no questioning my orders, no opposition. It was nice, sort of, being the boss, but there was too much responsibility. I had to be strong, capable, dependable, all the time, and I didn't always feel like that.

"Communication with the Enterprise is open," I was told, and I quickly composed myself, smoothing out my hair and clothing. I took a deep breath and sat down, poised, in the Captain's chair.

The screen lit up and I saw Captain Kirk's face, surrounded by the crew. My heart bled a little, because I missed them, but I tried not to show it. "Captain Kirk," I acknowledged him.

"Doctor O'Connelly," He nodded, and I corrected him.

"It's Captain O'Connelly, sir."

"Forgive me, I assumed Khan was captain of the Vengeance," Kirk looked puzzled.

"He was captain, and I was first officer. But Khan is no longer Captain of this ship; I presumed you knew that," My voice was tinged with ice, subtle, but enough so that he would detect it.

"I fail to understand what you are talking about, Captain O'Connelly, perhaps you could enlighten me -"

"You know full well what's happened to Khan!" I shouted, my temper exploding. "How the Federation sent that bastard Halcyon to take him back to Earth?!"

Kirk looked confused, one eyebrow raised. "I was not made aware of any such order. Let me check with Starfleet."

I sat there, seething. A lump formed in my throat and threatened tears, but I dared not cry. I was just too furious that Starfleet could possibly allow this. "They authorized a _massacre_ on Aquarius Seven," I finally said. "Just to get Khan. They killed hundreds, _thousands_. Missiles were fired at the walls underwater, and the domes shattered. It will take centuries to rebuild, repair. I hope you know, Kirk, because I was there. Because I saw _everything_. I saw thousands asphyxiate and drown, those not native to the planet.

"And for the record, Khan saved McCoy and I. He gave us the only wetsuits available, the only oxygen tanks left. He gave McCoy's his, so that McCoy could go to safety. And it's because of Khan that he's alive now. I had to swim him to the ship, and watch as the city crumbled behind me. I hope you know that he's changed, that he's a better man."

My voice was shaking, and my fists clenched tightly together. I wanted to hit something. Kirk had an understanding look on his face, and when he spoke, his tone was soft and gentle. "Chekhov has just informed me that there was no such order passed by Starfleet. This Halcyon character, how did you say he knows Khan?"

"He said they were brothers - half-brother's anyway," I explained, swallowing. "He claimed to have authorization from Starfleet to capture Khan and bring him back to Earth...oh my God, I've been duped...Halcyon's got Khan."

"Captain, we've found the Shovah," A man at my side said. "It's heading towards the Tagonar System. Does that sound familiar to you?"

"The Tagonar System," Spock said, furrowing his brow. "That's where the human genetic experiments took place, three hundred years ago...Halcyon must be taking his brother home."

"He's going to kill him," I murmured, alarmed. I was about to plead with Kirk to go after him, but then I realized that I didn't need to ask Kirk for permission anymore. I swallowed, straightening myself up. "I'm going to the Tagonar System," I said authoritatively. "And I am going to hunt down Halcyon. My only request is that you beam aboard Dr. McCoy, so that he isn't caught in the crossfire."

"Right away," Chekhov answered me, and Kirk gave him a look.

"Bryn, listen to me," Kirk leaned in on his knees. "I want to talk to you from the heart. Going after Khan is going to get you killed. You are a mouse amongst elephants; you won't be able to take either of them on. It wouldn't be a crime if we left Halcyon to dispose of his brother -"

"Wrong," I cut him off. "That would be murder. And I am offended that you would ever suggest that I would just leave Khan to _die_. I have to at least try -"

"You're thinking with your heart, not your head!" Kirk cried. "You could get everyone aboard your ship killed, for something so stupid -"

"Love is never stupid," I snarled. "And if you won't see things my way because of my love for him, go because Halcyon is a threat, and if he's tricked me, he can easily deceive others. Halcyon is dangerous, and only Khan can stop him. If you don't see the larger threat at hand, then don't go. But if Halcyon is going to be stopped, then we must save Khan."

I stood up, my jaw set firmly. "Now if you'll excuse me, Jim, I have plans to make with my crew."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen-

The first thing that I did after my communication with the Enterprise was go to my private chambers that once were Khan's and take a shower. I scrubbed away everything, rubbing the washcloth over my skin vigorously until it shone a rosy pink. This was me destroying the old Bryn O'Connelly. I would take orders from no one but myself; I was my own woman on a mission.

After my shower, I blow-dried my hair and walked through Khan's quarters, wrapped in his fluffy white towel. I'd requested my things to be moved here earlier, and I'd changed into a yellow dress, signifying my rank as Captain. I discovered that they hadn't touched Khan's things, and I took a sharp breath in when I saw his long black overcoat lying on a chair.

My fingers caressed the black fabric, and I stared at his garment in awe. I almost didn't want to touch it, for fear that I'd wake up and it wouldn't be real anymore. Suddenly, though, something snapped, and I grabbed it, twisting the fabric in my hands and pressing it up to my nose, breathing in it's scent. It still smelled like him, like soap, and dirt and just a bit of sweat, all mixed together.

I wrapped the coat around me, discovering it was way too big for me. I sat down in the chair, curling up in the corner of it and making myself very small. I used to do it a lot when I was younger, when the gang violence outside our home made things terrifying. I would brace myself against a large object and pray not to get shot at.

And now, smothered by Khan's coat, I felt warm and safe, albeit lonely. It was a protective cocoon, and I wasn't ready to emerge. If only I could let the world work out it's problems, and I'd be safe here...

He heard a knock on the door, and I slid out of Khan's coat, gently placing it where I found it on the chair. I went outside to see an officer standing there. "Captain, the Shovah has just landed on Eryon. We have their exact location."

"Great," I said, striding down the hall. "Officer, I'm sorry, but what is your name?"

"Officer Kristoffer Ward, ma'am," He said officially. I'd recognized him from the deck.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Bryn O'Connelly," I said briskly.

"Captain, what is your plan, exactly?"

"Go down there and rescue Khan, maybe take down Halcyon if I can," I entered a room, and was instantly being fitted in a space suit, that was skin-tight. I had to take off my dress to do this, and instructed Officer Ward to turn around. He obeyed, staring rigidly ahead, and I decided I liked him at once. When I was fully clothed, I told him it was alright to turn around.

"You intend to go alone?" Ward raised an eyebrow.

"I wouldn't put the crew at risk for a personal mission," I swallowed and tied my hair back, then securing my helmet.

"Suit me up as well," Officer Ward told the others while looking at me determinedly. "You need to rely on someone."

"Everyone I ever relied on is dead," I muttered, but he didn't hear. Once he was suited up, we were handed guns, and attached to parachutes.

"You ever parachute from space before?" He asked and we entered the base of the ship. We were in low orbit over Eryon, in position to jump down.

"Nope," I bounced on the balls of my toes nervously. The gate slowly opened and I looked down on the silver-grey steel of Eryon. It had been industrialized beyond belief, and then abandoned. And Khan was down there somewhere.

"Then you're in for a bit of a shock," Ward said, and then tackled me, sending me flying off the deck of the ship.

* * *

I was free-falling, hurtling through the atmosphere, certain that I was going to plummet to my death. Officer Ward's grip was tight around me as we somersaulted through the air, and I screamed through my helmet. "What do you think you're doing?!"

"This is the fun way to do it!" He shouted over the racing wind.

"You're crazy!" I cried, as we drew nearer and nearer to the ground.

"Just hold on!" He yelled and pulled us up so our feet pointed towards the ground. "Parachute in three...two..." I didn't hear him say one because I was screaming so loud, but all of a sudden, we were rising up abruptly, then gently floating to the ground. I tried to control my breathing as my heart slammed against my ribs, and only when we touched base with the ground did I begin to calm down.

"Never...do that...again..." I panted, getting up from my position on the ground of all fours. Ward laughed, and tucked away his parachute. "Now to find Khan..."

"Vengeance, this is your Captain speaking," I pressed the intercom on the side of my helmet. "What information do we have on the human genetic experiments on Eryon?"

"Looking it up, Captain..."

"Where would Halcyon take Khan?" I mused, talking half to myself. "Out of this whole planet, where would he most likely go?"

"Well the experiments were done in a laboratory," Ward contemplated. "And...that's the place they assumedly grew up...so wouldn't it make sense to return home?"

"That does make sense...and I can't find Halcyon's ship anywhere," I looked around the city, at the bleak, empty skyscrapers all around us. It was a forgotten planet, completely abandoned. It's population now was four. "Captain to Vengeance, find the coordinates of the lab where the experiments were done."

"According to my map, Captain, you're about five hundred yards away," The voice on the other end said. "Check your scanner; I've sent you the directions."

"Come on," I motioned towards Ward, and we trotted through the streets, towards a huge compound that I could already tell ran skywards and deep into the earth.

"Oh, shit..." He muttered, staring at the building. "How the hell are we ever going to find Khan in here?"

"Scan the building for signs of life," I ordered, and Ward looked at me sheepishly.

"Well there's always that..." He chuckled, and I realized he reminded me of McCoy.

McCoy...was he still on the Enterprise? Or was he on the safety of an Earth hospital, recuperating. Did he think of me? I realized I wasn't thinking of him as often as I should...

"They're in the basement, Captain," The woman in my ear answered, and I trotted up towards the doors and pulled them open, albeit with some difficulty.

"Great, thank you," I murmured, and Ward and I began the massive trek down the staircases, into the deepest layer of the building. With each step, my heart began to fill with dread and worry. What would I find? A sick, new form of torture that Halcyon had invented to use on Khan? Khan lying dead, dying on the floor, alone?

"Captain, there's something you need to know..."

"Not now," I muttered, on edge. I just had to get to Khan above all else.

"This is really quite important, I suggest you -"

"Please, not now!" I cried, reaching the basement door. With Ward's help, we heaved it open.

Before us were easily a hundred faces, all staring at us in various expressions of confusion, shock, and anger.

And at the center of them all, at the feat of Halcyon, was Khan.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen-

"Oh," Was all I said, realizing now what the crew was trying to tell me. Ward drew his gun, extending it from his body and aiming it at the ground.

"Your guns will do you nothing," A woman with shiny black hair sleeked elegantly back in a ponytail sneered. I swallowed, my eyes going to Khan. His hands were bound behind his back and a lock of his hair had flopped over one eye. His head was bowed, held down by the palm of his brother.

I took a deep breath, and took off my helmet, running my fingers through my hair. "My name is Bryn O'Connelly, Captain of the U.S.S. Vengeance," I said authoritatively. At the sound of my name, Khan slowly raised his head, looking alarmed. "And by order of Starfleet, I demand that you release your prisoner, Khan, under my authority."

"Starfleet," Halcyon scoffed, and there were several snorts of laughter. "Starfleet holds no power against us. Someone take these two children and dispose of them as you see fit."

"Halcyon," Khan's deep voice rose above all the others. He sounded so tired. "Let them go. They'll leave you alone."

"You," Halcyon pointed to a brute of a man, twice my size. He rose menacingly. "Kill them."

I whipped out my gun, flattening myself against the wall, completely at a loss for words. How could I negotiate when I had nothing to negotiate with? Then again, how could I have competed with the hundred super humans sitting before Ward and I, their only thought to kill us. The brute lumbered towards me, his eyes wicked and his gaze lethal. I aimed my gun at his chest, my arm shaking. The man merely scoffed and seized the gun while it was in my hands, and bent the steel in half. I stared at him, wide-eyed, and dropped the gun.

"Any further and I shoot to kill!" Officer Ward had his gun pressed up on the brute's temple, his face fixed, determined. "Back away."

"I don't take orders from a weakling," The brute snarled, his gaze still locked on me.

"Fine," Ward swallowed. "Then don't." He fired into the man's head once, and the man stumbled, and then again, going crazy with the trigger until the brute crashed to the ground with a thud, his head literally smoking.

Instantly, there was chaos. I felt someone grab me by the back of the neck and throw me to the ground, kicking me into a corner. I saw them surround Officer Ward, and I heard his screams of agony as they did God-knows-what to him. Khan was still at Halcyon's side, only his eyes were on me, yelling my name over and over.

My head was ringing from all the noise, and then I heard the worst of all, the tearing of flesh, the snap of bone. My stomach lurched as they presented Ward's head to Halcyon, and part of me wished I'd never come here.

"Now for the girl," Halcyon turned to me, and I began to tremble, completely defenseless without my weapon, without my backup. I was a doctor, not a soldier!

"Brother, don't do this," Khan pleaded. "If you kill a captain of Starfleet, they'll bomb this planet, they'll destroy you, and everyone here. Do you want your work to be extinguished? Do you want everything you've strived for, gone? Let her go."

"And have her report everything she's seen?" Halcyon cast a glance at Ward's headless body, bleeding out on the floor. "No. We'll keep her here, and she will suffer for this attack."

"We've both lost people," I spoke up. "We're even. Any attack on me is unnecessary and a violation of all regulations."

"A human's life is not nearly equivalent to one of ours," Halcyon said coldly. "We are physically and mentally superior in every way to you. You should be the one begging for death, because we are going to make your last moments painful." Halcyon stood up and crossed over to me. He began speaking in frantic, wild undertones, his voice charged with excitement. "We will break every weak, fragile bone in your body; we will snap every tendon, sever every nerve. Your weak, tiny limbs will be crushed under our thumbs; we will break you, Bryn O'Connelly, I will break you." He grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me violently to my feet, then slammed me against the wall, his hands going to my throat.

"Halcyon!" Khan thundered, getting to his feet. Two men grabbed him by the arms, holding him back. Already I couldn't breathe, and Halcyon's crushing grip meant that I couldn't last long. I had three minutes before I passed out. "Don't do this!" Khan roared, fighting his captors, his bonds, I could hear the strain of metal as he pulled against his cuffs. Khan's muscles bulged under his shirt. "Do this and I'll kill you!"

"No," I choked, my lungs screaming for air. "Please...Halcyon..."

I heard what could only be described as a pop, or a minor explosion, and Khan's hands were suddenly free. He broke free of his captors and sprinted towards me, seizing Halcyon and shoving him away. I went flying, landing painfully on the floor, gasping for air, my fingers gingerly touching my throat.

Khan swept me up in his arms, carrying me bridal-style and running from the room. He took the stairs five at a time, leaping effortlessly upwards towards the surface. I turned on my intercom. "Captain to Vengeance." I rasped, my voice weak. "Beam us up! Beam us up!"

"We're having trouble locking in your position!" I heard a frantic voice in my ear. Khan reached ground level and raced out the door, kicking it open with one foot. He raced down the steps, and I knew offering to be set down would only deter him. No human could run nearly as fast as Khan could.

"Try!" I pleaded. The other super humans were closing in on us, and Khan couldn't run forever.

Suddenly, the golden rings of light materialized around us, and I breathed a sigh of relief, as our feet left the ground and touched base on the Vengeance.

Khan collapsed on the floor, I still in his arms. He was breathing hard, but still held me close. "Khan," I breathed, touching his cheek softly. "You're alive." And then I burst into tears.

Khan held me close to him, sitting up and pulling me into his lap. I sobbed into his chest, and he held the back of my head with one hand, holding me close. "I thought I had lost you." I sobbed.

"Bryn, you never should have come," He said quietly, bending his head down by my ear. "They could have easily killed you, and they almost did."

"I wasn't going to let you die," I said firmly, pulling back and looking him in the eye. "I had to save you."

"You stood no match against them," He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, and his fingers graced the new bruises on my neck. "Why would you think to risk your life like that?"

"Because I love you," I said earnestly. "And even if I did die trying to save you, at least I'd die with you. That's better than being alone."

He kissed me then, soft and gentle, and I finally felt safe.


	16. Chapter 16

**Yesterday, I was at my cousin's soccer game and one of the girls on their team's last name was Khan. It made my day. Anyway, thanks for the continued support! Love you guys and thanks to all my new followers! :)**

* * *

Chapter Sixteen-

"Captain, where is Officer Ward?" A woman in red asked, and I looked up. Khan helped me to my feet. I felt chills go through me as I remembered his fate.

"Officer Ward died trying to save me," I said formally. "He was decapitated in the basement of the laboratory, and I assume his body is still there." I felt regretful for leaving his body there, but I didn't have much of an option. And Kristoffer Ward was a good man, for the brief time that I'd known him. I vowed to make sure that he was returned home with the highest honors. "Please beam up his remains."

"Right away, Captain," The woman nodded and left. I turned back to Khan.

"You're hurt," I gingerly touched the bleeding scratches on his face.

"I'll heal," He said dismissively, his expression growing concerned, passionate again. "But Bryn, there is a much more pressing danger now. The people down there - if people even is a word for them - have been plotting war for quite some time now. They want revenge on the hunans who created them."

"But those scientists have to be dead!" I narrowed my eyes in confusion. "That was three hundred years ago! Don't they realize this?"

"They know the scientists are dead, and that's not who they're after," Khan said darkly. "Starfleet authorized this testing, covering up the ugly sides to it and feeding the public what the public wanted to hear. They never told anyone about how many countless 'mistakes' were made, about all the defects." Khan appeared vacant for a minute, looking past me. It was the first time he'd mentioned his early life.

"Halcyon is leading them in a war against Starfleet," Khan sighed and continued. "To take his revenge."

"And where do you stand?" I asked softly. It made perfect sense that Khan would be just as angry at Starfleet for all that they've done to him. I knew he hated his brother, but he also hated Starfleet with every fiber of his existence.

"Beside you, of course," Khan looked down at me, squeezing my hand reassuringly.

"But Starfleet put you through hell, they've done so much to hurt you," I pressed. "I'm just concerned about what happens afterwards, after this mess is over."

"Bryn, please believe me," Khan said intently. "My loyalties lie with you. And wherever you decide to place your trust, I will place mine. No matter _what_ happens afterwards."

* * *

Weeks passed, and there was still no sign of Halcyon. I was concerned, but it dwindled with the passing time. We patrolled the Tagonar System, but nothing was amiss. I had trouble sleeping, which was only resolved when Khan was there, to hold me and reassure me that he wasn't leaving, wasn't dying, and wasn't going anywhere.

"Captain," One day, an officer approached me. "Halcyon requests permission to speak."

"What do we do?" I turned to Khan, who was with me. "I didn't even think..."

"Oh God, they've got the Shovah..." Khan ran a hand through his hair. "I never even thought about that..."

"What are you going to do?" I asked. "You have to answer."

"Bryn, I'm not the Captain, you are now," He said gently.

"But I was only acting captain," I protested. "You're the captain by right, Khan!"

"I'm not fit to serve, nor am I a member of Starfleet. You are the only one authorized to speak to him." I felt like whining, unsure of why Khan was thrusting this responsiblty on me, but I didn't. Truthfully, I was terrified of Halcyon. I didn't want him to see the bruises that still had remained, albeit faded, on my neck. I didn't want him to see my human weakness.

I swallowed down my cowardice though. I would not run from my fears. "Fine," I said, pulling away from Khan and approaching the deck, taking a seat in the Captain's chair. Khan stood behind me, laying a hand on the back of the chair.

Halcyon's smug face appeared on the screen, and when he saw me, his eyes rose with mock surprise. "Bryn O'Connelly, I didn't expect that my brother would allow you to play Captain?"

"I _am_ the Captain," I said, at the same time Khan said, "You are no brother of mine."

"Tell me, Bryn, what do you hope to gain from this little infatuation with Khan? And Khan, why in the name of all that is sacred would you fall in love with a human? A weak, fragile, little girl? Is she some kind of pet to you? Do you enjoy taking care of the spineless?"

"What is your intention for requesting contact?" I narrowed my eyes, trying to hold in my anger. I'd show him spineless...

"I wanted to inform you of something you may or may not be made aware of," Halcyon said smugly. "Scan the contents of your cargo bay, where the torpedoes were kept."

I was silent for a while, staring him down. "Do as he says," I ordered.

"The torpedoes are missing, Captain!" A woman in red cried, and Khan started in alarm.

"My crew," He breathed, his eyes growing wide. "What have you done with them?!"

"They're safe aboard my ship," Halcyon smiled smugly, knowing he had us trapped. "All seventy-two of them. And that means seventy-two more additions to our army. Would you fight against one of your own, Khan? Will you kill your own friends? I will ask you one more time: are you with us or against us?"

Khan swallowed, and I could see he was trying, and failing to hide his pain. He was so torn, and so was I. Would I be ready to face the fact that he might chose his crew over me?

Finally, he spoke, his voice tight and thick with emotion. "I cannot side with you. The blood bonding us is only so thick. You are destructive, and I cannot let you hurt more people. There will never be another massacre like at Aquarius Seven. I side with Captain O'Connelly."

"You disgusting hypocrite," Halcyon sneered. "Pretending to be so self-righteous and on the side of good. You want to play hero? Fine, you disgusting traitor. You appall me that you can just forget your little London stint, pretend you didn't attack a defenseless conference room, murdering Starfleet captains."

"People change," I spoke up defensively. "And Khan has, I've seen him. He is atoning for all the wrong he has done, but you...you so full of hate and revenge take it out on a defenseless community. You killed enough people to commit genocide!"

"Be quiet, human," Halcyon said dismissively, and I stood up, furious.

"Do not silence me," I seethed. "You will answer for what you have done, and I will make sure Khan is pardoned. So attack us. I _dare_ you." I knew what I was doing was stupid, and incredibly reckless, but I would not be talked down too.

Halcyon leaned back and narrowed his eyes, watching me. We stared at each other, almost daring at each other to strike first. I was breathing heavily, riled up with anger.

"Fine," He said coolly. "We can play games if you want. You just won't like the games I play, _Bryn." _He slammed his hand down over the a button in the control panels, and I heard a small, machine-voice on the other side say, "Missiles engaged, launching at the U.S.S. Vengeance."

"Warp!" I shouted, and Halcyon's face disappeared from the screen. I grabbed an intercom as the ship jolted with the first strike. "This is your captain speaking." I said, trying to keep a level tone. "We are under attack by the Shovah. We are trying to warp to Earth, and I request that everyone maintain their positions, and most importantly, stay calm. We will try and land on Earth. Thank -"

The intercom went flying out of my hand as the ship jerked violently to the side. I went flying out of the Captain's chair and hit the floor. "Entering warp!" Someone cried, and we were rushing forward. "The Shovah is...is following us into warp, Captain! And they're firing!"

Voices blurred around me, and I placed a hand to my throbbing skull. I was near certain I had a concussion. I tried to stand, but the ship was being thrown about with every strike from the Shovah.

"Khan..." I breathed, and the ship stopped moving. "Why are we stopping?"

"We've reached Earth, captain!" Someone shouted, and it was like the ship tilted, nosediving downwards. I went flying through the air, and hit the plexiglass of the windshield with a loud crack. I groaned, breathing beginning to hurt me now. We were on a crash-course, headed straight for earth.

* * *

**I hope you're enjoying so far! I have my first Regents (state testing) tomorrow, so wish me luck!**


	17. Chapter 17

**This chapter's in Khan's POV, to clear up any confusion.**

* * *

Chapter Seventeen-

The Vengeance was on fire. I was sweating so hard, and smoke was everywhere. Many people were passed out already, but I slid down the counters to get to the windshield where Bryn was. I saw we were nearing Earth; we'd already passed through the atmosphere, and were flying faster and faster towards the ground.

I grabbed Bryn, who was unconscious, and began to climb back upwards through the ship, hoisting her over my shoulder. If I had any chance of saving her, I had to find a place to brace ourselves.

"Approaching impact sight..." The metallic voice of the computer announced. "One thousand feet."

I pulled Bryn into a room and wrapped her in my arms, shielding her against the wall with my body. It was my best shot. "No matter what happens," I breathed, brushing her hair back and kissing her forehead. "I will always love you."

And then everything exploded around us.

* * *

I tried not to think as the ship crumpled around us, metal scraping up my back. I held onto Bryn tightly, praying she would live through this. The noise was so loud, as the ship dug through the ground, the buildings of the city. I knew thousands of people would be dead after today, and I would still feel responsible.

Finally, everything seemed to stop, and I pushed away the twisted, crushing metal around us, making a hole and pulling Bryn through to safety. She was bleeding, and motionless when I laid her gently down on the concrete.

"Bryn, wake up," I tapped her cheek lightly. Nothing. "Bryn!" I cried, my voice growing desperate. I checked for a pulse, but couldn't find one. My breaths became ragged and shaky, and I began to panic. "No! No!" I screamed at her, shaking her shoulders.

"You knew this would happen," I heard Halcyon's voice behind me and started, lifting Bryn into my arms. "You knew she was too weak to stand up to me."

"Go to hell!" I roared, and took off with Bryn in my arms, sprinting as fast and as far away as I could with her. I had to find help, she wouldn't be dead...

* * *

The Enterprise was watching the scene as they flew in towards Earth. "Keptin," Chekhov looked up at Kirk, his eyes huge and sad. "Ze Vengeance has crashed into San Francisco."

"Try to land," Kirk ordered, and the crew instantly obeyed.

"Detecting another ship, Captain," Uhura announced. "It's the Shovah..."

McCoy burst into the room just then, looking alarmed. "The Vengeance crashed..." He managed. "Oh dear God, Bryn's on that ship..." He ran a palm down his face.

"I'm sorry, McCoy, but no one could have survived that crash," Kirk said as kindly as he possibly could. "I'm really sorry."

"That bastard Halcyon..." McCoy growled, his voice thick with emotion. The Enterprise landed, and Uhura looked up.

"The Shovah has just touched down on Earth."

"Keptin, detecting two signs of life aboard the Vengeance!" Chekhov cried, getting to his feet. "One eez Khan, and ze ozer eez Bryn!"

"He's running, Captain," Uhura opened a camera view of Khan sprinting from the wreckage, holding an unconscious Bryn O'Connelly in his arms. "And...Halcyon is taking off after him!"

"Chekhov, you and I will go after them," Kirk got up, marching towards the door.

"I'm coming too," McCoy followed them, but Kirk stopped him, laying a hand on his friend's chest.

"You're still healing, Bones. Don't worry, we'll find her."

* * *

I ran down the streets, my heart straining and burning in my chest. I had been taught to ignore that long ago. Halcyon was after me, and Bryn was in my arms, her head resting in the crook of my elbow. Crowds of terrified people ducked out of our way or were shoved past us.

I knew I couldn't stop, only run until Halcyon couldn't anymore. And at first, it wasn't hard. Bryn was light and easy to carry, and even though I'd just survived my ship colliding head on with downtown San Fransisco, every gene in my chromosomes was designed so that I would be the fastest, the strongest, the smartest.

Unfortunately, Halcyon was the same exact way. And he was catching up with me. I darted through an alleyway, sailing over dumpsters and ricocheting off of walls, at times, only keeping one arm on Bryn.

I found myself on a rooftop, and stopped, looking around. I was trapped, one side bordering the bay, which I couldn't swim through because I had Bryn, and the others surrounded by higher buildings and the road. I felt my heart plummet when I saw Halcyon climb up aboard the roof, grinning like mad.

"Now I've got you where I want you, _brother_," He sneered, and I felt the rage inside me ignite. If Bryn weren't in my arms now, I would have strangled Halcyon and been done with it.

"What are you going to do to me?" I asked solemnly, glaring him down. I held Bryn a bit tighter. I wasn't about to let her go. "Kill me now? Of bring me aboard the Shovah and conjure up some punishment for treason? You know you want to, you sadistic little bastard. You know you enjoyed watching me suffer."

"I think I'll take the girl from you first, have a bit of fun with her first," Halcyon smirked.

"Not over my dead body."

"Fortunately, that will be easily obtained," Halcyon said arrogantly. "Give me Bryn."

"She's nearly dead," I said, and now that I said the obvious out loud, the more it hurt. She was slipping out of my fingers, and there was nothing I could do that could save her. "She's of no use to you, other than a hostage. And you have me. So let me be with her, until she goes. And then I'll go with you, I promise. Just give me this one thing, Halcyon."

"How romantic," Halcyon gave a tight-lipped smile. "But I still find it disgusting that you care to associate with..._lesser_ beings."

"You will never understand," I said fervently. "You will never even come close to understanding, Halcyon, because you have never known love. You've been taught to always push it away, to destroy it. But what you really don't understand is that love is a _thousand_ times stronger than hate. I love her, Halcyon, more than I love you, or our people, or anything else in the entire universe! Do you know why? Ever since we were born we were told that we were monsters, that we are not human; you of all people should know that. But Bryn can see past that, she knows I'm better than that. She makes me into a man again, Halcyon, and you will never have that, because you are _so full of hate _that you can't see past revenge! It's not about that anymore! Can't you see? You are better than killing, Halcyon. I've changed, and I know you can too."

Slowly, I laid Bryn down on the concrete rooftop and stepped over her body. Tears ran down my face, I was so passionate. I offered my hand out to my brother, knowing that he had to shake it, he had to see that this was the way to go now, not hate, not violence, not revenge. But forgiveness. "Brother," I said gently. "I know you can be a man too."

Halcyon stared at my hand for a long time. "I will never be like them," He snarled, and before I could even react, he had pulled out a gun. He aimed it behind me, and fired point-blank at Bryn, striking her in the abdomen.

"No!" I screamed, everything beginning to slow down. Suddenly, two figures materialized around us, but I didn't see who they were, my vision was so blurred with tears. I ran over to Bryn and knelt beside her, pressing down on the wound in her stomach with both hands, trying to stop the blood flow. "Bryn, don't go..."

Shots were fired, one after the other, until I heard the sound of someone hitting the ground. I looked up, and saw Halcyon dead, bleeding out on the rooftop, with Chekhov and Captain Kirk standing over him.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen-

I stared at Kirk and Chekhov, tears running silently down my face. Chekhov crossed over to us, and knelt down beside Bryn's body, softly reaching out and touching her neck, gingerly feeling for a pulse. I stared down at him, feeling like my chest was being ripped apart. I wished that Halcyon had shot me instead, hurt me instead, but left her alone.

"You're too late!" I shouted at them, tears flowing violently and freely down the sides of my face. "She's dead! Oh my God, she's dead..." I collapsed, burying my face in Bryn's neck and sobbing, no longer caring who saw. "Just kill me and be done!" I screamed. "I know you want to, Kirk!" I sat up, spreading out my arms. I knew I looked pitiful, and pathetic, and maybe that was what made the captain walk slowly over and lay a hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Khan," He said grimly.

"I tried to save her..."

"You did everything you could," Kirk said consolingly. "Kirk to Enterprise. Beam us all up."

I held onto Bryn's lifeless body as we were beamed aboard the Enterprise, and when we landed in the control room, everything was dead silent. I kept my forehead pressed against hers, my tears running down on Bryn's face. Let them take me, let them torture me, kill me. Nothing could possibly hurt as badly as this.

"No...no..." I heard McCoy's shouts, and heard the sounds of a struggle. When I looked back, I saw Kirk and Spock were holding him back with just about everything they had. "You let her die!" McCoy roared, fighting to reach her. "How could you let her die?"

His words cut into me like a knife, and I knew I was showing it. McCoy deflated a little, and Kirk and Spock slowly let him go. "Did you scan?" He asked quietly.

"Dr. McCoy, she's dead," I said bitterly.

"Give me that," McCoy swiped a hand-held scanner from Chekhov and ran over to us. "Just let me see her for a few seconds," He asked me softly. "That's all I ask for."

"If it pleases you," I said, my voice tight. Tenderly, I laid Bryn on the floor of the ship, flat on her back. McCoy waved the scanner over her body, over the horrible, bleeding wound in her abdomen. Suddenly, his eyes lit up, and he started.

"Get a stretcher!" He ordered sharply. "Now! Clear the sickbay!"

"Why?" I asked. "What is going on?"

"There's still a heartbeat," McCoy said, ecstatic. "And I can still save her, but it's a long shot." The stretcher arrived, and I helped slide her onto it. I trotted beside McCoy towards the sick bay, as he explained. "Her heart is incredibly weak, and the scanner shows that she's got multiple pieces of shrapnel lodged into her body. She's lost so much blood; she'll need multiple transfusions. The odds of her surviving are next to none."

"She's never been one for odds," I muttered. "Always, she's beaten them. She can do so again."

* * *

Bryn-

I was conscious, but couldn't see, like when you first wake up out of a sleep but haven't opened your eyes yet. I heard the blaring of a heart monitor, and realized it was my own. Voices came into focus around me, most distinctly Khan's and McCoy's. I was freezing cold, and realized I wasn't wearing a top! My first thought was of panic, that everyone could see me fully exposed, but then I remembered the ship going down, and blacking out. I had to have been struck by shrapnel, or something. The fact that my abdomen was burning fiercely contributed to this factor.

I heard the heart monitor begin to slow down, and I heard Khan's voice rise above the others. "McCoy, she's slipping!" He sounded so terrified, so afraid, that it frightened me and me want to just open my eyes and hold him, tell him everything would be fine. I'd tell him I was alive, but was I? Was this some sort of out-of-body experience?

"McCoy!" Khan roared, and then there was a shrill, high-pitched beep of the machine, that blared continuously and wouldn't quit. My heart had stopped.

And yet I was still _here_, still processing things, still aware of my surroundings. "BRYN!" Khan roared, anger and frustration consuming him again like a wild beast. It was a side of him I never wanted to see.

I felt his palms laced over my heart, then shoving down hard. "Don't, you'll only make it worse!" McCoy shouted, pushing Khan aside. He began chest compressions, pressing down, again and again, trying to start my heart.

"Come on, Bryn!" He cried, his voice desperate. I had to reach them, and I was fighting, struggling for consciousness. I didn't have much time. "Fight! I know you can!"

He gave two life breaths, pushing air through my lungs. And the chest compressions began again. "Bryn," I heard Khan's voice. "Please, come back to me. I know you're still in there, and you have to be listening. Come back, Bryn. Come back because I have no idea what I'm supposed to do without you, no idea how I can live without you. I love you so much, and you will never know...never hear me say it again." His voice was thick with tears. "You were the only person in the entire world that made me believe that I wasn't a heartless monster, an animal. You were the only person who's loved me, and that I have ever loved. Please Bryn, don't leave me."

McCoy pushed down again, and I cried out, finding my voice. Life surged into me, and everything was crisp and sharp. The lights were huge and bright, and every noise magnified. _So this is what being born is like_, I thought to myself. My sight became clearer, and I saw Khan and McCoy, both staring down at me. McCoy looked exhausted, and Khan looked so in awe and so appreciative that I burst into tears myself, reaching out like a baby for Khan.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, sobbing hard, and he held me close, wrapping me in a blanket and then lifting me into his arms, squeezing me so hard I feared I might break. "Khan..." I sobbed into his neck, sucking in air as quickly as I could. "I thought...I thought I was dead, I thought I'd never see you again!"

"You came back!" He cried, weeping in joy. "You came back..." He repeated over and over again, crying into my shoulder as I wept into his. Relief and happiness washed over me as I clung onto him, certain I'd never let go again. "What brought you back?" He asked, struggling to compose himself.

"You." I looked up into his impossibly blue eyes, so warm and loving. "I heard your voice, above all else. And I could never leave you, Khan."


	19. Chapter 19

**Just wanted to say thank you everyone again. This has been my most viewed and most subscribed story every, and it really close to being my most reviewed and favorited so thank you all for it's success! I love the support, and I'm done with my exams now, so it's all good :) Hello to my new followers!**

* * *

Chapter Nineteen-

Later that day, I was moved to the ICU of the Enterprise, after my condition was deemed stable enough. Khan stayed with me every second, almost fearful that if he left me, that I would quickly deteriorate and die. To be honest, I needed him, now feeling out of place on this ship that had once been my home. I was improving though, my condition getting better in the days that passed.

And yet, there was the elephant in the room that followed Khan wherever he went. One day, he would have to answer for what he had done, and everyday that passed was a day closer to his imminent trial.

One day, after I had been moved to my old quarters, there was a knock on my door. I was still confined to a wheelchair, and Khan stood. "I'll see who it is," He said, and walked regally over to the door.

"Khan," McCoy was standing there, his expression rigidly formal. "The Captain wishes to speak to you about your impending trial."

"Of course," Khan replied smoothly. "I'll go at once." He turned back and faced me, his expression softening. "Don't worry, Bryn." He smiled, and I gave a sad one in return. "I'll be fine."

He turned and left, but McCoy didn't, hanging around in the doorway. "May - may I come in?"

"Please, do..." I said, looking down at my lap for a moment and then looking up again. McCoy entered, and took a seat across from me.

"How are you feeling?" He asked shyly. I'd never known him to be shy.

"My stomach still pains me sometimes, and I'm still quite tired often, but I've been walking more and more these days. Khan's been helping me with that." I felt a bit guilty for saying Khan's name in front of McCoy, but I wouldn't lie to him.

"And...and Khan," He stared down at his lap, looking uncomfortable but trying to hide it. "You and him..."

"Bones, I'm sorry," I swallowed. I knew I was hurting him. "But it's going to always be him. He told me how you did CPR, and how you were the one who saved me. And I will always credit you with my life, Bones. _Always_. But don't you see? We can never be together, it just won't work. It can't. And I am so, so sorry because I know this is hurting you - it hurts me too - but it will never work." I stared at him, tears welling in my eyes. He looked like I had driven a stake through his heart, his mouth contorted and his eyes steely. "I will never stop caring, Bones. I will always care about you, and you have to believe me when I say that this is for the best."

The silence that followed was so painfully loud that it hurt more than any words he could say would. I swallowed the lump down in my throat, and McCoy looked up. "I...I don't really know what to say, Bryn."

"I'm sorry," I whispered. It's all I had left.

"I know," He sighed and stood up slowly. "Bryn, best of luck on the trial." He gave a tight smile, and I felt horrible about myself. "You'll need it."

* * *

Khan was taken into custody a few days later, his trial scheduled for tomorrow. I was terrified, because all too quickly, he could be snatched from me again, and I wouldn't have anyone left.

I was speaking in Khan's defense, and so was Kirk, which I thought to be nothing short of a miracle. We all went to the courtroom, dressed in cadet's clothing, and I still in my wheelchair. Khan was sitting near the front with his lawyer, his posture rigid, his back to us. My heart was pounding, and I felt like I would be sick.

"Ladies and gentlemen," The judge boomed, and the courtroom fell silent. "Now we shall commence the trial of Khan Noonien Singh. His charges include domestic terrorism, mass murder, murder of a Starfleet Admiral, attack on a Starfleet doctor and theft of a Starfleet vessel."

There were murmurs throughout the audience, and I wished I could see Khan's reaction. On one side of me, McCoy was scowling, and on the other, Chekhov looked worried and scared, like me.

"Prosecuting attorney, please step forward, and Khan, take the stand." Khan arose, and was escorted up. I saw both his wrists were chained together, and that made me feel sick inside, like the jury had already decided he was guilty. Everyone in this courtroom, with the exception of myself and a few of the Enterprise crew was looking at him in disgust.

The prosecuting attorney was a short, stocky man with black, huge eyes and a beaked nose. He arose from his chair, and swooped towards Khan like a bird of prey. "Do you plead guilty or innocent that it was you behind the London bombing, the attack on a Starfleet conference, and the murder of Admiral Marcus?"

"I plead guilty," Khan said, his voice cool and calm. "And I confess and admit too all of my crimes except for one. The Vengeance is my ship, not Marcus's. I designed that ship, I was in charge of building it. He even _asked_ me to develop the ship for him, to make a space ship like no other. I did not steal, merely take back what was rightfully mine."

"Describe the intention and purpose of the Vengeance," The judge said, leaning closer to Khan. "I do not recall any records of new spacecraft being produced."

"That's because Marcus didn't want you to know about it until the damage would have been done," Khan almost sneered, as if the fact were obvious. "The spaceship is a larger, faster vessel, capable of housing four times the amount of a regular ship's crew. It runs efficiently and smoothly, and is capable of enabling the ship virtually undetectable on other's scanners, firing five times the amount of missiles a normal ship would have. In short, Your Honor, Marcus's ship is the perfect war machine."

"And what was the intention of this 'war machine'?" The justice looked very alarmed, and people were buzzing with concern. "Why would Admiral Marcus possess a weapon of this capability, unauthorized?"

"Because he wanted a _war,"_ Khan narrowed his eyes. He had everyone hanging onto his every word. "And he wanted my brother and I, along with the countless other genetically modified 'superhumans' to lead it."

The court went up into an uproar, and the judge had to slam his gavel to get everyone's attention. "Order in the court!" He thundered, and everyone fell silent.

"Despite your attempts to deter from your accusations, Khan, we still must continue with this cross-examination," The prosecuting attorney pressed. "This is not a trial condemning Starfleet, it is a trial condemning you. About your murders, as you killed Admiral Marcus, what was your intention? Or can you not feel anything but hate, Khan? Did you feel no regret as you crushed his skull inbetween your hands?!" The prosecuting attorney seized a file and waved it above his head. "I have Marcus's autopsy results right here!"

"That's not right," I grit my teeth, muttering aloud. "He can't say those things to him."

"Objection!" Khan's lawyer cried. "Your Honor, my client doesn't have to answer that, it is an opinionated answer and Mr. Crowe was directly attacking him!"

"Sustained," The Judge said, and I relaxed.

"Answer me this then," Crowe said darkly, glaring at Khan. "If you are willing to confess to your crimes, tell everyone why it was that you would kill thousands of people with your attacks."

"Marcus used my friends, the members of my crew, against me, to exploit the pent-up rage and anger that had been sitting for three hundred years as I lay in suspended animation," Khan said bitterly. "He threatened me with their lives, saying he'd kill them all if I did not obey him. When I was awoken, and learned that my crew was gone, I had every reason to believe that he had murdered them all, in cold blood. _That_ is why, Mr. Crowe. I took my revenge."

The courtroom was dead silent after that, and my eyes moved to my lap. As much as I loved Khan, this was still so hard to listen too."

"Why would a Starfleet admiral ask you for help?" Crowe asked. "Why could _you_ possibly be able to help him, as opposed to anyone else in Starfleet?"

"Because I am better," Khan said vaguely.

"At what?"

"Everything," Khan replied coolly. "Admiral Marcus needed to respond to an uncivilized threat in a civilized time, and for that, he needed a warrior's mind - my mind - to design weapons and warships."

"You are suggesting the Admiral violated every regulation he vowed to uphold, simply because he wanted to exploit your intellect..." The judge said, trailing off.

"He wanted to exploit my savagery!" Khan cried, smacking his palm against the stand. "Intellect alone is useless in a fight. Marcus used me to design weapons. I helped him realize his vision of a militarized Starfleet. He sent you to use those weapons, to fire my torpedoes on an unsuspecting planet, and then he purposely crippled your ship in enemy space, leading to one inevitable outcome: the Klingons would come searching for whoever was responsible, and you would have no chance of escape. Marcus would finally have the war he talked about, the war he always wanted."

I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. Undoubtedly, there were people present who still supported Khan. How were they reacting to this news that never should have been discovered?

"You're saying Admiral Marcus tried to begin a war pitting Starfleet against the Klingons?" The judge sounded astonished. In no way was this trial going the way he expected it to be.

"Yes, Your Honor," Khan said quietly.

"Trial adjourned," The justice announced tiredly. "We'll meet again in fifteen minutes." He banged his gavel, and everyone got up. Khan stood, and I nudged Chekhov.

"Wheel me over to Khan, will you?" I asked, and he got up to obey. "Khan!" I cried, as I was pushed over to him. He turned when he saw me, his face relaxing a little.

"I'm sorry, doctor, but you're not allowed to see him," A cadet stood in front of me, blocking our path. "Rules."

"Don't worry, Bryn," Khan cried out over his shoulder as he was escorted away. "It'll all be fine!"

I watched the doors slam behind him, and I whispered softly, so only Chekhov could possibly hear. "Don't mess this up."

* * *

**I modeled the cross-examination bit after the scene from "Into Darkness" when Kirk is interrogating Khan with Spock. The dialogue is very similar (I just made a few little changes), so I wanted to clear that up by saying its not mine. There, now no one can complain that I copied it because I did so on purpose and gave credit to the movie. Also title/tt1408101/quotes is where I got it from.**

**Anyway, hope you're still enjoying this! The trial will continue next chapter. Review!**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty-

When the court returned again, I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I would have to go up soon, and testify. What if I said the wrong thing? Would I condemn Khan even further?

First though, was a witness to the London bombings, a small, mousy middle-aged man with a nervous habit of licking his lips. He looked nervous with Mr. Crowe staring at him, even though they were technically on the same side.

"Mr. Thatcher," Crowe began. "Describe to us the events of the bombing. Where were you at the time? What were you doing? How did you react when the explosion went off?"

"I was at the cafe, sir," He said, and his tongue darted out over his thin, pale lips. "Having tea with my coworker, when the explosion went off. The cafe I was at...it wasn't far from the explosion. Glass shattered everywhere from the windows and we were thrown from our seats. We were both alright, and I ran out of the cafe to see what was going on." He licked his lips again, and massaged his hands.

"The street was covered in debris from the explosion, and bits of buildings were still crashing down. People were screaming everywhere and the blood...there was so much blood on the streets. There were wounded people everywhere, just screaming, screaming..." Mr. Thatcher put his hands over his ears, shutting his eyes tight. He began to rock slightly, back and forth.

"Mr. Thatcher, are you alright?" The judge asked.

"Your Honor," Khan's lawyer stood up. "The witness is not mentally stable enough to continue with this trial."

"Mr. Thatcher, you are dismissed," The judge said firmly. "Could an officer kindly escort him out?"

"My point, Your Honor, was that it doesn't matter if you weren't killed in these attacks," Crowe said viciously. "What Khan did was barbaric, ruining the mental stability and emotional well-being of thousands. Even putting him to death wouldn't be enough to avenge for all of the lives lost."

"Defense," The judge moved on, and Crowe took his seat. "We shall call Dr. Bryn O'Connelly to the stand." Chekhov arose and wheeled me to the front of the room, and with a strong, steady arm, helped me stand and enter the witness stand. I sat down, finding even climbing those few steps to be difficult.

Khan's attorney approached the stand first, her face kinder when she saw me and my weakened condition. "Doctor, I see you have some difficulty walking on your own," Her voice was gentle, not a taunt. "Can you explain to us how that happened?"

"I was in the Vengeance, serving as Captain of the vessel, when we were attacked with missiles from Halcyon's ship," I answered, my voice shaking. I stole a look at Khan, and saw him hanging onto my every word.

"And who is Halcyon?" The attorney politely interrupted before I could continue.

"One of the genetically engineered 'super humans', who despised Starfleet and wanted revenge for the years of maltreatment and eventual freezing of himself and the others like him." I paused. "Also, he is Khan's brother."

I let that sink in, before I continued. "He was attacking our ship because Khan had decided to side with Starfleet rather than join Halcyon in his plot to destroy Starfleet. He was aboard the ship, and Halcyon was trying to blow us up. We warped to Earth, but Halcyon's ship, the Shovah, followed us and fired upon the ship. The Vengeance, as you all know, crashed to Earth.

"Khan and I were the only survivors, because after I was thrown down on the wind shield of the deck, knocked unconscious, Khan grabbed me and carried me as far as he could into the ship, and then shielded me with his body as the ship crashed." I stopped, tears in my eyes. "I would have died." I muttered, my voice tight with emotion. "I should be dead."

"Continue when you can, doctor," Khan's attorney said, and I fought to compose myself. "But can you tell us what happened after you crashed? I can imagine you were unconscious, but you must have had some of it recounted to you."

"Sure," I said, taking a deep, shaky breath. "After we crashed, Halcyon landed on Earth, and began to pursue Khan. Khan, rather than leave me behind, carried me through the streets as Halcyon chased him, eventually to a rooftop. Khan was trapped. He tried reasoning with his brother, tried to change him for the better, but Halcyon turned and shot me, point-blank, in the stomach. That's when Captain Kirk and Mr. Chekhov were beamed down. They killed Halcyon, and I was taken to the Enterprise, where Dr. McCoy saved my life. I died, on the operating table, but was resuscitated. I wouldn't be here without any of them."

"And how do you feel towards Khan?" She asked. "After knowing all of the crimes he committed, but he still saved your life, and countless others by leading us to Halcyon?"

"I love him," I said firmly, and the entire courtroom seemed to gasp all at once. "I know what he did, but I know why he did it too. Ever since he was born, _in a lab_, he's been taught to hate, to kill, to embrace the anger and ignore love, compassion and mercy. But even after Starfleet officers tortured him, even after Admiral Marcus had taken away all he'd ever cared about - his crew - he can still love, he can still forgive. People can change, and Khan is no different. He forsook his own _blood_ to save my life, multiple times. I know he has done atrocious things, but in light of the crimes Marcus, and even the whole of Starfleet, have committed, it is not difficult to forgive the man who has forgiven those who have done him wrong."

"No more questions, Your Honor," The defense attorney, sitting down, and once again, Chekhov helped me back to my seat. My hands were shaking. Had I been too personal? Had I revieled too much?

I could barely focus when Captain Kirk and Chekhov went to the stand. I'm sure their words were kind, but I'd never know. I wanted to throw up, the suspense was eating away at me. Would Khan be sentenced to death?

The trial ended, and the jury was sent off. I couldn't read their faces, but I had an awful feeling in my stomach. The jury was taking hours to decide, so Chekhov, McCoy and Kirk tried to make me go out for lunch, to at least eat something, but I picked at my food, afraid it would come up again if I swallowed even just the tiniest morsel. I hadn't eaten all day.

It was late at night when we were told the jury had reached a verdict. Everyone filed silently into the courtroom, the excitement and anticipation hanging on everyone's breath. Khan was escorted back into the room, and I found it difficult to breathe, so see straight. My nerves were eating away at me, and I could barely stand it anymore.

A slim, petite woman stood up on the jury bench. "The jury finds Khan Noonien Singh to be guilty on all charges."

I felt like someone had hit me with a sack of bricks, right in the chest. I couldn't breathe, only struggle for air in vain. "Bryn," I heard McCoy say beside me, speaking in a low undertone. "Bryn, are you alright?"

"Of course I'm not," I choked out.

The judge gave a heavy sigh, and opened his mouth. "While both Khan and the jury declare guilty, I believe Dr. O'Connelly's testament that Khan is true. I believe he has changed. However, his crimes cannot be ignored. So, I hereby sentence Khan Noonien Singh to one hundred years in suspended animation, in a maximum security prison. When those one hundred years are over, he will be awoken, and his sentence over." The judge banged his gavel, and the courtroom went up in conversation.

"Khan!" I screamed, my voice raw and broken. He turned around, crushed, I could tell from his expression. I would not live a hundred more years.

"Bryn!" He cried, and two officers stood to escort him out of the room. "Let me see her," He lowered his voice when he spoke to them. "Please, let me just say goodbye."

"No!" In a burst of strength, I pushed myself to my feet, holding on to the armrests of the wheelchair. "Khan!" I took a wobbly step towards him, and then another. I nearly pitched forward, but strong hands caught me by the arm and righted me again.

"Bryn, I know it's hard -" Kirk said beside me.

"No you don't!" I screamed, trying to pull him towards Khan with what little strength I had. "You don't know! Khan!"

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry," He easily shrugged off the guards at his sides and ran over to me, taking my face in his hands. "I'm so sorry."

"Khan..." I didn't know what to say, so I wrapped him as tightly as I could into my arms. "I love you."

"I love you too," He swore, kissing my forehead.

"Lets go," One of the officers called, his voice sharp and cold.

"Take me too," I pulled back from Khan, and stared down the officer. "Freeze me alongside him."

"Bryn, are you crazy?" McCoy exclaimed, but I ignored him.

"There's so many regulations..." The officer bumbled around a direct answer.

"I don't care," I said firmly, and looked up at Khan, touching his cheek gently. "Wake me up when he does. But I'm never letting him go."

"I'll see what I can do," The guard frowned, and turned, going towards the judge.

"Bryn, you don't have to do this," Khan said softly. "You have your whole life ahead of you."

"My life is with you," I said intently. "You know that there's nothing here for me. Without you, I am lost. If I go to sleep, and that's all it is really, we'll wake up and everything will be alright. Back to normal."

"Alright," Khan said, hugging me again.

"Bryn," Chekhov said behind me, and I turned to face him, a sad smile on my face. "We weel mees you."

"I'll miss you too," I let go of Khan and hugged Chekhov, planting a light kiss on his cheek. "You were always kind to me. I won't forget that."

"Thank you," He smiled sadly, and I pulled away, facing McCoy next.

"Bones..." I said softly, and he tentatively reached out and hugged me with one arm over my shoulder.

"I'll miss you, Bryn," He said quietly. "And I'll never stop caring."

"Neither will I," I promised, and let him go, my eyes tearing up. Captain Kirk stood before me, his expression like that of a proud father. "Captain," I saluted him, one hand leaning on the armrest of a chair.

"No, Bryn," He shook his head, and I heasitantly dropped my hand. "I salute you." He snapped into an unaccustomed rigid formality, saluting me solemnly. "It was an honor to know you."

"Likewise, Captain," A tear slid down my cheek, and I took Khan's arm.

We were led out of the courtroom and escorted via shuttle to a laboratory. I held Khan's hand the entire time, and he steadied me as we walked through the halls.

Finally, we reached the room, and I saw two cases prepared for us to enter our hundred-year sleep. "Are you afraid?" Khan leaned over, whispering in my ear.

"Very," I breathed, swallowing nervously.

"It will seem like the blink of an eye," He promised, and it was then that they separated us, and had us lie down in our respective cases. They looked like coffins, just a bit, I thought.

"I love you," I called, just as they were about to close my case.

"I love you, Bryn," He cried out. They were the last words I heard, before everything plunged into darkness.

* * *

**This is the final chapter of Lost in the Stars. I want to thank everyone for all of your support in writing this, as it was extremely encouraging to wake up to several emails alerting me about new followers, new reviews, etc. Keep an eye out for new stuff coming soon and thanks!**

**xoxox**

**Jasper**


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